I heard someone asked, “Are children bad mannered because of a lack of affection from parents?” Her friend answered “No, kids are bad mannered because of lack of discipline and most parents that suck will say that they do discipline but the truth is that they waffle back and forth and scold there kids then feel bad about it and butter the kids up.”
I sort of agree with that,
WE HAVE A 2 YEAR OLD THAT ACTS LIKE HE GETS NO HOME TRAINING. HE LOVES TO YELL “NO!” AND DOES IT FROM THE BOTTOM OF HIS BELLY! (HOW EMBARRASSING) Our NOW 4 YEAR OLD USED TO DO THE SAME. NOW HE’S A WHOLE LOT BETTER.
I do call kids out on their behavior though. In my home, if kids say things like, “I want a soda!” My response is, “I am sure what you meant was, ‘Mrs. Smith, may I have a soda
please?” They look at me dumbly for a moment and then they stammer out the phrase. And then we stumble through thank you and you are welcome. When I see kids treating wait staff poorly, I do the same thing. I also do it in front of their parents. 99% of the time the parents are embarrassed when I say, “Sam, please remember to say please and thank you to Lakesha. Mr. Perkins and I come here all the time and I don’t want them giving me a bad table because of you.” And please note, I speak up after multiple transgressions. I do not slam a 6 year old who forgets to say please because he is so excited about the movie he just saw. I speak up when a 10 year old acts like a jerk on many occasions and has never reigned themselves in.
Please, thank you and excuse me.
Most times reminding our fellas to use magic words do work. Like any learned behavior, manners must be introduced as early as possible and reinforced consistently. In our home, if you can talk, you can use manners. We have them use them everywhere, especially at home, with each other, from us, parent on down; after all charity begins at home. Simple enough, but they will get it and learn about generosity, feelings, thankfulness and meaning.
Here’s two GREAT links to check out: Just click on it.
THANK VERY MUCH FOR STOPPING by- QC Supermom