Friday Four: Moms+Toxin=Politics

Moms+Toxins equals Politics. When someone hears the words toxic, they think awful personality. When I hear the word, toxic/toxins, I think lowered immune system,cancer, birth defects, early puberty, asthma, ADHD, diabetes, birth defects, obesity, and other sickness.  I think stop buying things or supporting companies that make them and contacting my elected officials and asking them to make changes for my family. We don’t know it, but that’s politics.

Samya Tiffaine Pressley- Scott Sunrise 05-09-94        Sunset 10-25-05

Think about it., As more products come in the market, so does more illnesses. However when we don’t support them, they run out of business,or improve the product/service. With enough heat , our political representatives  are more inclined to speak up for us* (um- most times). 

As a advocating wife and mother of 9 (8 living), it’s difficult to find products free of toxic chemicals,” We must find alternatives, read and research weird labels, and tell Washington pass stronger laws on toxic chemicals.

The worst thing that could happen is that you can loose a child as I have. The best thing is that change will be made. I have been on the loosing side and it’s painful, forever and destructive. Alone, I know I can’t make much noise, but with powerful moms groups like MomsRising and NC Toxin Free, we can move mountains.

Since loosing my sweet Mya, we’ve made these four changes. 

1. We’ve stopped using air fresheners- we now use herb based mixtures.

2. We’ve stopped using pesticide grown food (well sorta) – we now wash everything before we eat it, if it isn’t organic.

3. We’ve stopped using strong chemicals to clean- that stuff required opening windows AND holding our breath. Now we use more baking soda, vinegar and oil based mixtures, I still use bleach for laundry and hard jobs(with the windows open of course).

4. We’ve stopped using Bisphenol A /BPA(it’s a bad chemical used in most plastic production. Although it’s harder to keep up with the boys BPA free things, it’s worth it. We now use more glass items, which includes mason jars as cups.

Bonus: We have even got rid of our moth balls! That was a hard habit to break. But once we learned that those cute, smelly, white balls could cause headaches and irritation to nose, throat and lungs, we stopped buying them! Instead, we make sachets from dried lavender/ cedar and equal parts dried rosemary and mint.

RESOURCES:

Here’s 5 EASY ways to avoid toxins. Compliments of NC Toxin Free Top5Tips

Here’s great information on chemical facts: chems_factsheet2014+cites

Stroller Brigade- Team Work makes Dreamwork

“I believe that the rights of women and girls is the unfinished business of the 21st century” — Hillary Clinton

Let my heartbreak be our wake up call! Mom Up!

Join MomsRising

Join NC Toxic Free

Have a great weekend,

QC Supermom

Wednesday Wow: Dr. Maya Angelou May 28, 20014

 

Maya Angelou ‏@DrMayaAngelou · Apr 29
I have a certain way of being in this world, and I shall not, I shall not be moved

Maya Angelou AKA Marguerite Johnson with out debate lived an incredible life. She eluded wisdom, strength and power. When I heard that she transitioned. I felt at a loss and grateful. Why? Because “They Just Aint Make Em’ Like This Anymore!” I could listen and read her work forever. Many times when I’m low and weak, it’s her words that life my spirits up.

Listen to yourself and in that quietude you might hear the voice of God. ~Dr. Maya Angelou

Her words were nothing  of guide posts for anyone one that listened. Her voice was strong and certain.

Dr. Maya grew up in a time where women actually helped each other through life struggles. Because of her work her on Earth, she will never be forgotten.

Her life serve as a reminder that there is nothing you can’t overcome if you hold your head high, love and remember that you are truly God’s phenomenal work. I’m so grateful to have her work here to share with others including my daughters and myself.

1.  “I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back.”

2. Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.

3. “If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love.”

4. “I encourage courtesy. To accept nothing less than courtesy, and to give nothing less than courtesy. If we accept being talked to any kind of a way, then we are telling ourselves we are not quite worth the best. And if we have the effrontery to talk to anybody with less than courtesy, we tell ourselves and the world we are not very intelligent.”

5. “If you get, give. If you learn, teach.

6. “You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.”

7. “All great achievements require time.”

8. “Courage allows the successful woman to fail and learn powerful lessons from the failure – so that in the end, she didn’t fail at all.”

9. “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

10. “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside of you.”

11. “I know for sure that loves saves me and that it is here to save us all.”

12. “I’m a woman Phenomenally.”

13. “Nothing can dim the light which shines from within.”

14. “Nothing will work unless you do.”

15. “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude. Don’t complain.”

We have lost an incredible force. I can only hope that my daughters  and I end up as strong as her. I’m so  thankful for her life. As she moves to the next level of her journey, let us offer her the same light and love that she has given to us.

Thank you Dr. Maya Angelou,

QC Supermom

Friday Four: Good Work for SAHM/SAHD

It’s amazing how people always want to know how we do so much with our 6 (of 9) children.
We stay on the go and in the mix. Many of which are free, very affordable or sponsored. Neither my husband or myself sit on anyone’s time clock. I home-school and my husband goes to school full time. I’ll tell you how I keep money in my pockets. I make money doing what I know. It’s easy and almost anyone can do it.. I help people (mostly moms) find jobs and sometimes I do them myself…… in addition to blogging of course.

Here are my top four stay At Home Mom /Dad money makers:

Tutor-

 

If you are especially good at any one academic subject consider opening a home-based tutoring service. Tutors can charge anywhere from $10 per hour or up, depending on your credentials and expertise. This business can be mostly or completely set by you. If you need time off, simply don’t schedule any clients during those times.

I usually meet my clients at the library. If you like, you can also turn any room in your home into a learning area rather easily.

Childcare-

 Most parents are not capable of staying at home, and must put their children in daycare. Why not with you? If your home is large enough to accommodate a few kids during the day, this is an extremely straightforward way to start making money. Simply spread the word among your friends and family that you are willing to babysit.

The best part about running a home-based child care business is that if you do a good job, you will likely be assured of steady income for years. Parents are usually reluctant to switch babysitters once they find someone trustworthy and affordable.

Freelancing-

This business opportunity capitalizes on one of the stay-at-home parent’s biggest marketable strengths: flexible work hours. Unlike a structured, in-person 9-5, freelancing is perfect for stay at home parents. As long as you hit deadlines and produce good work, the clients who hire you do not care at all when, where, or how the jobs get done.

Event planning- 

If you consider yourself a “people person” and/or have a lot of contacts or experience at putting events together, this could be an ideal fit. Here are just a few of the major events that people typically seek help in planning:

• Weddings
• Graduation parties
• Welcome To The World Ceremonies
• Speaking engagements
• Corporate functions

Event planning is similar to many of the business ideas discussed above in that it thrives on word of mouth. Once you obtain your first few happy clients, it becomes easier and easier to drum up more business and increase your cash flow – all (or mostly) from home. If you need help with any of these, contact me. I would love to offer you a 90 minute ( $60 -payable via Paypal.com) consultation to help you get started. I’ve helped many Stay At Home parents, why not you?

Wednesday WoW: The Brainy Bunch

Having six out of ten kids go to college is no small feat on its own, but having six kids in college by the age of twelve— that’s nothing short of incredible.

The Hardings are the first to say they’re not geniuses. Nor do they run a strict, high-pressure household. Instead, they find out early what really motivates their children, instill their kids with dreams, and allow those dreams to blossom.

I gotta kick things in high gear!

 

Meet Kip and Mona Lisa Harding, high school sweethearts whose simple homeschooling method produced exactly those extraordinary results.

Kip and Mona Lisa are parents to an engineer (who earned her BS in mathematics at 17), an architect (who finished her five-year program at 18 and became the youngest member of the American Institute of Architects), a Navy physician (who earned her biology degree at 17), an entrepreneur (who earned a BA in English at 15 and an MS in computer science at 17), a 15-year-old college senior studying music theory and performance, a 12-year-old Middle Ages scholar with the highest average in his college class, and four others who are following fast in their siblings’ footsteps! 

Mrs. Harding and I talked about her views on college choice and expense, the importance of flexibility in learning, what drives and motivates them and their family dynamic.  Mona Lisa also offers some practical advice, encouragement and relief for other home ed parents looking for balance.  I am so pleased to have met and connected with Mrs. Harding and hope to reconnect again in the future! As for my crew of 8. I am not expecting to get those results but I do hope to produce happy, well rounded, self sufficient ,children. What I didn’t find out is who pays for college and what tools does she use. I do know that Mona Lisa is a penny pincher by nature, I  feel confident to suggest that they don’t spend a whole lot.  (my type of girl)  Mona Lisa is wise to go a step further and profit from her hard work. She and her husband offer an eBook, speaking sessions, and even private tutoring sessions. What a smart way to bring in income. well i gotta go now and get our home school day flowing. Keep well!

Your comments and questions are always welcomed. Thanks for reading.

Can’t wait to review the book for you all!

You may have a Child Genius and don’t even know it

My baby girl is an introvert. She’s the weird one. She’s the highly sensitive one. Why didn’t I take my prenatal vitamins? Why can’t she be more like me or at least her dad? How can I help her make friends? YES, all of this has been running through my mind for months now.

Although we love her dearly, we had to get her social skills up to par. Even though Ashley (family) tried to get me to scale back on her. In my mind I just had to fix her; fix this so society wouldn’t hurt her.

We planned a joint birthday party for our teen girls. One of our daughter’s have an abundance of acquaintances to mingle with, but “D4” didn’t. It led me to change the event into a family cookout. What can I say, our job as mom is to build our children self esteem. Needless to say, I was feeling like a pure failure – for all of three days.

On Friday,I opened my email to an unexpected invite. There was a British Production Company looking for genius kids for a new season. I felt intrigued to take all of the eligible kids. I figured that I’d let the producers pick through them. Surely, at least one of them would be a genius. 🙂

Fast forwarding- they selected “D4”. She did extremely well. (Yes, it surprised me too.) Since I wrote this, “D4” has made the 2nd round of interviews and I’ve learned how to nurture her more positively. Sounds like a win already!!!!!

Per Child Genius:

The characteristics of gifted children

Very often parents are the first to recognize that their child is bright for his or her age, identifying characteristics in their child which are common to many gifted children including:

• Reasons well and learns rapidly

• Has extensive vocabulary and talked early

• Early or avid reader

• Asks lots of questions and learns more quickly than others

• Has a very retentive memory

• Is extremely curious and can concentrate for long periods on subjects of interest

• Perseverant in their interests

• Has a wide general knowledge and interest in the world

• Enjoys problem-solving, often missing out the intermediate stages in an argument and making original connections

• Has an unusual and vivid imagination

• Is intense and shows strong feelings and opinions

• Concerned with justice and fairness

• Has an odd sense of humour

• Sets high standards and is a perfectionist

• Loses interest when asked to do more of the same

• Is sensitive (feelings hurt easily)

• Shows compassion and is morally sensitive

• Has a high degree of energy

• Prefers older companions or adults

• Judgement mature for age at times

• Is a keen observer

• Is highly creative

• Tends to question authority

• Has facility with numbers

• Extremely good at jigsaw puzzles

Get more details here!

Sounds like a sure fit here, I’ll keep ya’ll updated! If any of these pointers sound like your child don’t label them or go crazy as I did. Nurture them,

QCSupermom

Friday Four: Smart Tips From Mama (part 3)

As we close out our week long celebration honoring moms remember that moms come in many forms: some are assigned to us by birth and some we claim simply through heart felt connection. To have the honor or be one is a blessing. If you missed the previous post, see here: 1st and 2nd.

Take a look at these last 4 strategies for raising smart, well rounded, confident, healthy children. If you haven’t already, surround yourself with powerful, generous women that want to pour goodness into you.Childhood goes by too fast. You must have support to enjoy it all.  

7. Push “Unable” off the Table

I gave my children an attitude—a “don’t quit” attitude. Although I made it clear that it’s OK to fail—if you learn from it—or even stop for awhile, it is not OK to give up at the first hint of difficulty. They need to know that life is hard, and struggles are always there, bt at the heart of any success is the ability to keep going no matter how tough it is, how rough it might get, or how long it takes.

• You Have to See a Real Man/Woman to Be a Real Man/Woman. When sacrifice is in your home, let them know. Julius and I let our kids know matter-of-factly when we sacrificed our time and effort for something our family wanted or needed. This gave the children a chance to appreciate what each parent should do for the family. They get the reality lesson they are not entitled and everything does not magically come to them. They see that hard work is what makes it all happen.
• Build a House of Praise. Listen, anytime a child’s parents think he is wonderful, the child is going to fight to prove them right. Some kids do the wrong thing because they rationalize: my parents think I’m a loser, so, why fight it? Be careful what you say—do your best to think of another way to convey your thoughts if you are disappointed in your child.
• Embrace the “H” Word. Homework—that big, bad “H” word—is inevitable. It is also one of the flash points toward a child’s ultimate success or failure. It is definitely the most important thing you can help your child to master. The kids knew I was available to help—but I wouldn’t do their homework for them (besides, most teachers know exactly what’s going on).
• Beware of Turning Out Cookie-Cutter Children. Even in the same family, kids can have completely different skills.. I cannot expect him to “be” them—and I don’t.
• Everyone Can’t Be a Ballerina. Some parents have unrealistic expectations. Parents who were always good in math or sports for some reason think their kids will automatically be the same way. If your daughter would rather jump rope than become a ballerina—let her do it, because not everybody can be a ballerina.

8. Don’t Lie Down with Anything You Don’t Want to Live with Forever

Kids don’t want to hear parents talk about sex—they don’t even think we have sex. But we can set them straight about those birds and those bees.

Be open and honest with your kids about sex.

• Don’t Just Talk About Sex, Talk About Responsibility and Relationships. I never talk about sex without talking about responsibility and relationships. Sex is serious business with lifetime consequences.
• Hold Out for Moonlight and Reality. It’s important that your kids know the difference between soap opera romance and the real thing. Teach them the tricks to keeping romance strong while they work, raise children, and clean their house. Hey, couples can still make out in the kitchen while the kids are busy, or flirt until they go to sleep.
• Don’t Stand for a One-Night Stand. I impressed on my daughter Andi to believe in true love so she wouldn’t let down her guard or jeopardize her life for someone who might never call her back. I told her to set standards so she wouldn’t turn into a statistic.
• Because I Said So and Did So. Role models do matter. In our Rock household, there was a world of love and laughs. Even though Julius and I were the parents, we had a separate, deep relationship with each other. Our children were blessed to be able to watch us have good times together. I was a model for them to follow when the time came for them to settle down with one person. If you are separated or divorced, point out healthy relationships around you.

OK, fast pep-talk review: sex education is not a backstage pass to have sex. Take charge by having The Talk and answering questions honestly—don’t leave it to your child’s friends or siblings to get to them first. Help your kids to wise up so they don’t end up living with something or someone that could cramp their style, health, and reputation for a lifetime.

And, of course, don’t talk about sex without talking about responsibility and relationships—it’s too beautiful, personal, and blessed to simply be a recreational sport. Sex is meant to be between people who love and care about each other and for the children they create.

9. Good Memories Are the Best Things You Can Give Your Children (Besides Good Manners)

I never understood the true importance of good memories until Julius died. I was grief-stricken and didn’t want to do anything. My sister-in-law, Elaine, urged me to remember the fun times Julius and I had together—she said to be grateful for the wonderful memories I did have. She was right, it was the memories of our life together that kept me going.

I continue to be supported by the memories of our family life together. When I listen to my children tell the stories of their lives, I’m often moved to tears when I realize Julius and I helped make some of those good memories possible. My fondest hope is that our children will always try to give their children positive, inspirational, and often hilarious things to remember.

• Know Your Family by Your Traditions. I know our family continues to stay strong when traditions and memories are handed down—it is our own personal history, from what we serve at holidays to always giving the children new books at Christmas to helping others in the neighborhood. There are also, though, smaller, everyday traditions you may not think about that can create a part of your family’s identity and be a great source of memories. For instance, the way my kids waited for their chance to go call Daddy for dinner; or what about when you go to that certain place for a treat every time you shop nearby; or the indoor picnics you have when the weather turns bleak.
• Narrow the Generation Gap with Holiday Traditions. Holiday preparation time offers an opportunity to include all the generations. Even the youngest can help with cookies, candies, breads, or cakes. The little ones can stir the bowl, pour in the milk—and even a baby can lick the frosting! Get everyone involved.
• Good Memories Don’t Have to Cost Good Money. You don’t need to go all over the place or spend a fortune to find family activities that create great memories. Have a “Board Game Dinner Night”—we still do that. Pick out a board game and play it with your children or ask another family to join you.
• Talk Up Your Memories Through an Oral History. During the holidays when families get together is a great time to have your family members record those tales (especially the older relatives) on tape or in a journal memory book. So many families leave all the storytelling to “Aunt Edna,” and then when she is gone, no one knows the stories. This way you can protect those memories and they will be a treasure forever, and I do mean forever.
• It’s Never Too Late for Traditions. Maybe you say you don’t have any traditions—or not enough to keep your family connected. In order to start or add a tradition, try to figure out what you enjoyed the most as a family. Ask your kids what they remember from the last holiday and see if that could become part of your holiday each time. The most important requirement of any tradition is the ability for it to reconnect the generations with the fond memories that matter this year and every year.

10. Spirituality Is Not Just for Sundays

Those who delve into any spiritual life always come up with same core of truth—that it is all about connecting with a higher power than us. When you help your child develop a spiritual foundation, you give him a guide to a moral and ethical life, a guide to treating people right, and a deep, abiding sense of confidence that he will pass on to his children.

• The Church Is Not a Convenience Store. In the same way we cannot expect the schools to teach our children everything, neither can we expect any church to do it all. Parents, you have the ability to teach your children the importance of faith by your example—not only in religious doctrine, but by what goes on in your home (for example, the love between parents, and their shared commitment to a home where values such as respect, helping others, forgiveness, patience, and loyalty are as important as anything they simply “hear” or “read” in church).
• Honor Your Children. Why honor your child? Because your child is God’s gift to you. One way to honor a child is to take the time to be aware of his differences within your family. You honor his gifts, creativity, and good qualities. Another important way to honor your children    is for you to spend time with each child individually.
• Honor Your Parents. In many ways, the respect for authority that is learned  at home is the key to a child’s success. I don’t think honoring a parent means fearing parent. Instead, it implies regard and compliance with parents’ word and rules of the household, which the parents have created.

BONUS- Don’t forget—it is you, the parent, who plants the seeds of spiritual values in your children, not only by what you teach them about your God, but by the way in which you live your life. Treat each other with love, respect, and forgiveness—help your children understand the importance of this. When all else fails, your child’s spiritual background will sustain him.

From the book Mama Rock’s Rules by Rose Rock with Valerie Graham. Copyright © 2009 . Summarized by permission of HarperCollins Publishers.

 

 

 

Hope you have a great Mother’s Day Weekend,

QCSupermom

Smartest Things Mom Ever Taught Me (part 2 of 3 )

Spring brings many joys, Mother’s Day is one of them. Monday, I shared Best MotherHood Advice EVER!  It was the first in a 3 part series on impressive tips for mothering. These strategies should be given to each mother at birth, but hey, I’m impartial to the author. Enjoy!

QC Supermom & Rose Rock

3.  Wipe Your Mouth Out Before You Come into the House

My children were not allowed to curse inside our home—lies were not welcome either. Words that hurt others were also not permitted. All of that negative talk should be cleaned up before anyone comes into my house, or yours.

• Don’t Pay the Profanity Price. Anyone who knows how to communicate well is more likely to be taken seriously. If your child’s conversation is a cascade of cussing, respectable people will give him the brush-off. Even if he’s not ignored, he will leave a bad impression. You can stop your children from being a disrespected person if you stress this fact of life.
• Buy Your Kid Some Battle Armor. Your biggest job is to build up your children—let them know how great they are. This helps equip them to deal with whatever comes at them, especially if there are bullies or people who try to humiliate them. You put some invisible “armor” on your kids every time your validate how important they are to you. Do it enough and nothing can penetrate that “armor” away from home.
• Dispel the Lie: Names Do Hurt. Of course, being called a name won’t admit you to a hospital, but words that shame wound deeply and can still hurt years later. After all, broken bones can be fixed, but hurtful words and taunts can cause pain for a lifetime. Insults, like name-calling, can create self-doubt that doesn’t go away. It’s even worse if a parent hurls verbal abuse.
• Tell the Truth and Nothing but the Truth. The expectation in my house was simple: we expected our children to tell the truth. No matter what a child did, we parents were there to help—as long as they came to us with the truth. We did not accept lies. Be sure to give positive support for honesty, even if you must deliver consequences for the actual bad deed

Remember, to make it plainly understood: your children must tell you the truth. It is so important to instill respectful and honest communications inside your home—leave the cuss words, lies, and shameful behavior outside the front door.

4. Feed Them and They Will Tell You Everything

Even with all the commotion and busy work involved, there are moments when I’d give anything to have all my children back as they were, ready for me to serve up dinner. It was great to sit back with Julius and watch the kids laugh and talk. Nobody had to run upstairs or do homework. It was a special family time.

We made the time to connect. We used it as a chance to listen and to learn about the kids. We were surprised at what we found—even when we didn’t look too hard.

• Stop the Distractions Before You Sit Down. Turn off iPods and computers—lose the cell phones. Don’t allow toys or games, either. Parents—as tempting as   it is—don’t bring the mail to the table. Make it an island of calm for your day.
• Make Every Meal an Occasion. You don’t need to prepare a four-course dinner from scratch to have the benefits of a family meal. It doesn’t matter what you serve. Even if it’s fast food or takeout, you must have everyone sit down together at the table. We’ve eaten sub-sandwiches from the corner deli and had the best evening by just relaxing and sharing.
• Dinner Is a Fact-Finding Mission.At dinner, we talked about whatever happened in the neighborhood and the world, and we made it funny. We talked about what was on TV and we got around to smoking, drinking, and other kids’ problems. If someone talked about future party plans, we got a heads-up about it. Listen closely, you’ll hear the name of the friend who is having the party, where it is being held, and what other friends might come along.

5. You Are Whatever You Answer To

A goal for parents is to help our children believe in themselves and their unlimited potential. And, help them not to think or talk badly about themselves.

Creativity- book driven

• Bust the Media’s Myth. Whether they understand it or not, young people want to be part of the glamorous world they see paraded in front of their faces. You need to bring it out in the open and discuss these issues. Discuss how they don’t need to compare to the small percentage of models or movie, TV, and MTV stars who set these “standards.” They don’t have to answer to that.
• Quit Talking Bad About Yourself. As you teach your children not to answer to anyone else’s “putdowns” or unrealistic media expectations, make sure your kids don’t put themselves down either.
• Catch Your Kid Doing Something Good. Don’t ever forget to show your kids what they did right every chance you get. Emphasize positive intentions—and praise, praise, praise whenever you can.
• Don’t Bow to the Power of the Peers. Find out what kind of advice your child’s peers give him. No matter what he tells you don’t “diss” that friend, ever. Simply suggest another alternative—after all, kids are easily swayed.

Help your children learn to answer to their own authority—not what others label them—and to the greater authority of what is right in this world. Teach them to be self-reliant by reinforcing the value of being true to one’s self—of having the courage of their own convictions.

6. Reading is Righteous

Listen, I don’t care what motivates a child to read—I just want to see it happen because I know what reading can do. I know the positive and important things it did for my children and what it can do for yours. if your child can read well, he will do better in school. Reading always equals doing better in everything because a reader can understand more and has a broader perspective.

• Be Proud to Read Out Loud. Just because your kids have learned how to read on their own doesn’t mean you should stop reading aloud. That’s a great time to ask the kids to read a section of a book to you. It will also make them feel important.
• Have a Family Affair with Reading. Try to schedule a special reading time for your children. Fit it into your family schedule just like a baseball practice.
• Don’t Forget Library Power. I have such good memories of the library—it is such a great resource. The local library can be a meaningful place for your kids—especially if you get to know the children’s librarian.
• Join the Clipper Club for Readers. I have a bad habit of clipping articles, quotes and sending them to my son in college. If I see inspirational or interesting stuff, I send it. Most times he like to see it too. Especially the little boys. I paste things on water bottles and all.
  

  What better thing to do in a car?

Bottom line, we need our kids to read! Reading is the great imagination and visualization tool. When a child hears the words or reads to himself, he has to visualize.

Reading opens the world to travel, to be up on what’s happening in the world, and to discover the world’s knowledge and ideas from some of its finest thinkers. It is the ultimate freedom.

Get busy, (this is part 2.)

QCSupermom

 

Best Motherhood Advice Ever! (3 Part Series)

In attempts to share my pearls of motherhood wisdom, let me first say that I LOVE being a mom! I know that I’m a better person being one.

I only dreamed of having 2 children. So when I started multiplying.  I found myself quiet overwhelmed as I became we- OVER & Over Again. At that time, I was so ignorant. I thought more children meant more hair loss. More stretch marks, More runs to the local schools, increased living expenses. Less time for me…….and my husband.

More children meant less money in my pocket. What I’ve found over the years is how to use what I have to handle my family needs. I ‘ve how to use my time and resources  wisely. I’ve gained a new perspective in life and have learned what is most important in life.

Thank God, with my age came wisdom. As becoming a mom overall has been a gift from above.

I was blessed with nine amazing miracles. I’ve learned that to be a parent is and should be a calling.

There is absolutely nothing as great, challenging, or rewarding as raising a child. These pointers, I hope to show parents that their role deserves reverence, respect and pride.

 

1. I Am Your Mama, Not Your Friend

I never felt the need to be friends with my children—not when they were eight or ten. Not even when they were sixteen years old. My kids had their own friends and I had mine. I never set out to win any popularity contests on the home front. Like my mother, I know my kids don’t have to like me—neither do yours.

Every parent must have the courage to be in charge and to say no. You can have fun with your kids just like you can with a friend—we had plenty of fun—but you can’t be afraid to enforce the rules because you might lose your child’s affection. As parents, we have to protect our children. That is a job for a parent—not a friend.

• Draw the Line to Win Respect. It’s never OK for your child to disrespect you in any way, at any time, for any reason. They need to know that up front.
• Join the Congregation of Expectations. Setting your rule expectations is the most important thing you can do for your children. You must state clearly what you want. If we were going somewhere like Wal-Mart, I might say, “We are not buying today.” That way, the kids knew before we went into stores that toys and such would not be purchased. Don’t wait until you are in the store to announce this—if you do, you end up having to say no, repeatedly.
• Don’t Just Set the Table: Set a Good Example. I know my children did not have to look at fictional heroes for good examples. A real-life hero sat at the head of the dinner table every night at our house. He was their father. His dedication and commitment to his family was a powerful model for all our children.
• Pull Out That Can of Whup-Ass. My whup-ass expands far beyond just a physical punishment. It’s about whatever I can do to change a negative behavior. It is about taking something away from a child and how he feels about it. Most times, the anticipation of an open can of whup-ass is worse than the final punishment.

Remember, above all, the key thing you can do for your children is to spell out exactly what you expect from them. Don’t be all talk and no action—follow through on what you say and be a good role model to your children.

2. No Child Really Wants to Be Left Alone

It is up to us to make our children feel protected and secure by creating structured boundaries. We need to let them know we care enough to set the rules. Children without rules may boast of being free from the “sissy” or “stupid” rules their friends have to follow. Yet, deep inside they long for some kind of structure and don’t want to be left alone.

• More Structure=Better Discipline. My formula is simple: more structure for your kids creates less trouble and less need for discipline. Rules and routines help your kids know what to do without being told repeatedly.
• Be The Boss. Single parents need to keep their family rule structure in place, especially if they suddenly become single. Step up to the game (especially if you are raising boys) to let them know the rules must continue to be followed. Impress on them that you still call the shots—yes, just you—because even alone, you remain the boss.
• Be There BeCause You Care. All kids want to know they matter to someone. They want to know they are important to you by the way they are received when they need you. It would be wonderful if each child had at least one adult in his life who put him ahead of everything, who was madly in love with him; one person—a parent would be ideal—who lights up when he walks in the door.
• Be Your Brother’s Keeper. When my cousins came in after a fight, he’d tell us what happened. Their dad would turn to the other brothers and ask them where they were when this was going down. If they were there, he’d ask what they did to help him in this fight. He felt strongly that no sibling should stand by while another was being hurt, threatened, or picked on. We stressed the importance of being responsible for each other.
  

  The best mother ever! My mom and daughter. I miss her so much.

*From the book Mama Rock’s Rules by Rose Rock with Valerie Graham. Copyright © 2009  Number of pages: 256, Price: $16.99. ISBN: 9780061536113; ISBN10: 0061536113

Happy Mother’s Day week! Celebrate with us on FaceBook!

QC Supermom

(Twitter too!)

Friday Four: My 1st 5k foam fest

I will be completing my very first organized run ever this Saturday! The foam run is called 5k Foam Fest.  I was so apprehensive about participating because I haven’t worked out in 7 years and I did not want to be “the very last one.” But I couldn’t disappoint my daughters. They won the ticket for me downtown from a vendor at “Alive After Five”  (It’s a weekly festivity held at the Epicenter in Charlotte, NC.

First things first. The “K” stands for kilometer. A kilometer is 0.62 of a mile, which makes a 5K race 3.1 miles long. I did not know that until the day I won the pass 7 days ago. 

In less than 10 hours I will be an official Foamlethe! (yes, it’s a real word)

 

Pre-Run Routine

Before you start a run, you need a good warm-up routine, which includes dynamic stretching to get the blood flowing. Leave the static stretching for the post-run routine. Dynamic stretching includes walking lunges, butt kicks, high knees and toy soldiers—straight-leg kicks that stretch the hamstrings. Dynamic stretching will increase your flexibility and help prevent injuries by strengthening your muscles and joints. After doing some dynamic stretching, walk briskly for five minutes, then speed up to a comfortable jogging or running pace.  -fitness people

My top tips for surviving your 1st 5k with very little training.

Know that there will be people who will finish before and after you. Be there for yourself. This fun run is a promise to myself to make fitness fun. 

1. Just up and walk 3 miles.Shoot for everyday if you only have a short time to train.Try this cute app.

 

2.Load up on good food. Good food choices will get you where you want to go thy say. Blueberries,Low-fat Plain Yogurt, Rolled Oats,Lentil Soup, Bananas,Whole Wheat Pasta,Oranges, Foods to Avoid: Steer clear of sugared soft drinks, processed grains (white bread), french fries, pastries, scones, sugared cereals, syrup, whipped cream, chips and movie popcorn.
Bananas
If you need a carb-packed energy-booster before an afternoon run, it’s hard to go wrong with a banana. A bonus: Bananas contain loads of potassium, which regulates blood pressure and reduces the risk of stroke.
Using a food diary may help with your planning at home or while away. What is really important that you drink plenty of water throughout the day. 

3. Take a friend or partner. I’m taking my son. Mom and son training walk  He is an athlete 2nd, and my son 1st., So I know that he will want to hang with his mom, but I released him from having to stay with me during the run. If you’re running with a friend, figure that out early on. Knowing this will ensure no ones feeling being hurt. It’s just a great strategy to avoid conflicts, criticizing, or other disappointment.

4.There is no shame in walking. Some people run; some people walk. I wun. If the feeling hits to pick it up a tad bit, do it! I will find people closer to the pace I’m at so we can support each other.

My trainer,and 1st born  Keithric Pressley said that a 5K is long enough to challenge you, but not so far that you’ll become discouraged. At 3.1 miles, a 5K is a very doable running distance. …… We’ll see! I’ll be sharing photos in Monday’s post. 

Chow!

QC Supermom

5k Foam Fest FAQ’s

Good food choices

Running Tips

Wednesday Wow: Papa Murphy’s AND the Mom Tour

Papa Murphy has the best pizza PERIOD. The end.

A few moms and I had the opportunity to tour “Behind The Counter” of Papa Murphy’s Pizza Shop.I know, it doesn’t sound like a big deal, but wait till I tell you more about the #papamurphysmoms visit.

We fulfilled our wildest dreams when we made our own dough!

After seeing how much work goes into preparing the ingredients,I felt honored to partake of the yummiest pizza ever. They have the biggest mixer called Hobart. Besides the cheese, it’s the next expensive asset there. They dice fresh vegetables daily and for you calorie counter’s out there, they weight everything!

This is how the pizza is sold after you order it. Instructions and all.

The Papa Murphy’s mission is three common core values which, when done consistently, create a “great” Papa Murphy’s pizza experience.- Chris Ware Store #36

They have no oven, toaster, or other heating apparatus. So you can’t call it a “restaurant” What they do offer is fresh ingredients, awesome service and the freedom to make it your own at a fair price.

Their Menu Treasures:  (they have these with the normal pizza toppings)

Fantastic toppings that include:  Zucchini, Artichokes hearts, garlic,Canadian bacon, 2 different vegetarian meats, then you can try meat stuffing; crazy desserts like Gluten Free CC cookie dough. They even have side items like: bottled crushed red pepper and herb and cheese blend. Gosh, I am sure that I’m leaving something off, here  -see more here- .

They salivated over this.

I wanted to know what steps do the reduce waste. He explained to us that the plates the pizzas are sold in is placed in the oven and then on the dinner table. Which is also the same for the Mimi Murphy’s.  Speaking of them, the Mini Murphy’s, ALL OF My CHILDREN LOVE THEM. My 21 year old college son paid my 3 year old off for his, minus the tattoo that came with it.

Oh and before I forget, Papa Murphy’s Pizza accepts EBT (SNAP).

This is a great stress free place for your older teens to work. And if you are looking for a great business opportunity – go with Big Papa Murphy (Chief Executive Officer, Ken B. Caldwell) ! Franchise fees are less than a restaurant and as Mr. Chris stated, it has been a blessing to his family. Not only is it an upper body workout to cut the huge blocks of cheese. The pizza crew also have a strategy to rough up the dough to protect staff from Carpal tunnel syndrome. Chris also mentioned that he

Buy them there & forget the small packs.

loves working with PTA’s, and other family or community based fundraising groups.  I could go on and on, but for now, I think I’ll sit back and finish my plans for Mom’s Night Out 2014 on the 9th!

Enjoy, you now, QCSupermom