Wednesday Wow: Getting Married In N.C.

Getting married in North Carolina? It can be something aggravating. I know first hand. My sisters are still calling me Bridezilla’. As a non-denominational wedding officiant, I wanted to remain relative`, so I asked a few friends what has the hardest part of getting married and each of them responded pretty much the same, “finding a non-denominational wedding officiant”. Turns out, not everyone wants to get married in a church. I didn’t. The other top issues centered around selecting an affordable and compatible officiant. I can help with that.

What should be included:
  • Many officiants include a get-to-know-you meeting with the couple, followed by two or three planning sessions. Most officiants provide several options for ceremony wording and structure, as well as a choice of readings. On the wedding day, the officiant arrives early, has the witnesses sign the marriage license, and performs the ceremony. Afterward, the officiant mails the marriage license to the county so it can be officially recorded, and mails a copy to the couple.

Why does it cost so much for 20 – 30 minutes of work?
It is completely understandable for couples and their guests to assume officiants earn an unusually high amount of money for simply prompting the couple through their vows and pronouncing them husband and wife, but that is only part of the story the most visible part.

Competent officiants invest time before the wedding gathering the pieces together and ensuring the desired flow of the ceremony is there. Time may be spent helping the couple customize vows, decide between a unity candle or a sand ceremony, and/or writing the opening words, a blessing. Ceremony composition is far more time-consuming than the joyful occasion itself.

Officiants are often present well before the service to calm nerves or confer with a wedding consultant, the photographer, and other wedding vendors. We are usually asked to stay for a portrait after….sometimes waiting for a long receiving line to conclude or family portraits to be taken first.
Officiants in North Carolina are also responsible for ensuring accurate completion of the marriage license and submitting it to the appropriate county clerk recorders office and there are travel and/or postage expenses associated with this responsibility.Wedding officiating is a business with accompanying expenses. Officiants must advertise, maintain home offices, have internet access, make long-distance phone calls and travel to the ceremony among other costs.
Your officiant is a professional every bit as much as your caterer and your photographer.

I would love to share Jabela: Non-denominational marriage officiant and life celebrant with you. I have been marrying couples since 2007! See more about her here—> CLICK HERE! Here’s the Facebook page: CLICK HERE!

Here’s more information:

On-Line Marriage Application Form
On-Line Marriage Application Form Only valid for 10 Days.

Us wed

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Soulful Saturday

Last weekend in the Queen City was super busy! And we loved every minute of it! I tell ya, there is never a dull moment in the QC!

Image result for black santaImage result for black santaImage result for black santa

 

 

As a 70’s baby, I grew up in mainstream -everything! Every depiction of Santa that we saw — from television to movies to storybooks — shows that rosy-faced, jolly grandpa who is unapologetically white.  He looked nothing like me. Am I not generous?

Am I not generous? Are others like me, not givers? At a certain age, I think it does matter subliminally and he’s not just a jolly, ole fat guy in a red suit.

Is it possible that a long, white beard, the big-bellied man in red with dark skin would not appeal to children in predominantly black and Hispanic parts of the city?

Well, a few of my children and I got to see for ourselves this weekend. We attend two events and both had a positive turn out!

Soulful Santasoulf

The first was Pride Entrepreneur Education Program, (PEEP) it’s a nonprofit of Pride Magazine. They had the happiest SoulfFul Santa on the Westside there. The crafts table was there to reinforce the holiday spirt by giving children the opportunity to create gifts for their loved ones.

The other event was at the Free Store Charlotte. It was outdoors and loaded with fun!  From face painting, coat drives, amazing hot fancy and filling food complete with cocoa, jump house, fire pit, free gift table, and so much more.Image may contain: one or more people, fire, food and outdoor

Did You Know: The Mall of America – the country’s biggest indoor shopping complex – decided to hire a black Santa for the first time this year!

I wanted to know how some of my mom friends thought about ethnic Santa’s. So I spoke with three of them from my mom group, Queen City Stay At Home Moms and each had very interesting responses.

The first mom said: “We balk at the notion that our children should believe that a white man brings them toys, when we ( black parents) are the ones working hard to make their children feel safe, loved and happy/ “

The second  mom asked, “Why can’t there be two at each at a time? Like half brothers? When I was small enough to believe in Santa, he was dressed so completely, including the beard, that I could see only his eyes behind thick glasses. I could not see, nor did I care, what skin color he was.  I would definitely take my children to go see an Asian Santa,” 

The last mom commented:” Santa’s race matters. White folk have enough superheroes. I’m white, but have no tolerance for the abysmal prejudice and past treatment of people of color in this country.”

santa-soul

Although we do not celebrate Christmas, I wanted my children to see that the Santa doesn’t have to look only one way. Santa can be whatever they want him to be. Looking at my littlest Noah’s face, he may never want to go see Santa again, but he has photographic evidence that Santa can reflect the skin tones of many cultures. And that’s, well, pretty magical.

To see more culturally diverse Santas all you have to do is show up when he’s in town. Charlotte organizations like PEEPs, and The Free Store Charlotte will continue to invite him in our hearts, centers, businesses and home! black-sooul

End Notes-

Baron Davis adds a bit of color to Christmas with The Black Santa Company

The former NBA star aims to diversify the holiday with his game-changing venture.

You can find children’s books that feature a black Santa Claus, and he appears in some ornaments and other products. The website blacksanta.com, founded by the former N.B.A. player Baron Davis, sells products like T-shirts, hats and ornaments featuring images of black Santa. In a classic episode of “The Cosby Show,” Dr. Huxtable explains to one of the children that as Santa drops down each chimney, his race morphs to match that of the family he’s visiting – Asian, African-American, Caucasian and so on. -By The NYTimes

Scholarships for College Kids

Don’t wait. Apply for these great scholarships today! There are scholarships there that are still open! There are thousands of scholarships out there. Some are large scholarships that are well publicized, while others are lesser known.

Here are 27 scholarships for Saturday, December 3, 2016.

Jay Kennedy Memorial Scholarship
Sponsor: The National Cartoonists Society Foundation
Amount: $5,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to students at a four-year college in the United States, Canada or Mexico who will be a Junior or Senior during the 2016-2017 academic year. Applicants do not have to be art majors to be eligible for this scholarship. Applicant must submit an entry form and eight samples of their own cartooning artwork.

Lance Surety’s College Scholarship
Sponsor: Lance Surety Bonds Associates
Amount: $1,500
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to undergraduate and graduate students enrolled at an accredited university, college or trade school in the U.S. Applicant must submit an essay on one of three given topics related business or surety bonds.

ssThere’s nothing like studying in a great smelling room! Buy Scentsy now! 

Larry E. Sitzman Youth in Nebraska Agriculture Scholarship
Sponsor: Nebraska Pork Producers Association
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to students currently enrolled as a full-time undergraduate or graduate student at a fully accredited college, university or technical college in an agriculture related degree program in Nebraska.

Law Office of Joseph J. LoRusso Scholarship
Sponsor: Law Office of Joseph J. LoRusso
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to students who are planning on attending an accredited U.S. college or university during the spring 2017 semester. Applicant must submit an essay on a topic related to car accidents.

Lead Roster Scholarship
Sponsor: American Marketing Ventures, Inc.
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to high school and college students worldwide who have an interest in sales and marketing. Studying in the fields of Business, Marketing, Computer Science, Communications, or IT are recommended but not required. Applicant must create a video sharing why they should win the scholarship.

Legal Templates Annual Scholarship
Sponsor: LegalTemplates
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to students who will be enrolled in college during the Spring 2017 term. Applicant must create a business plan executive summary that is original, creative, unique, and persuasive.

Los Angeles DUI Attorney Diabetes Scholarship
Sponsor: Los Angeles DUI Attorney
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to incoming and current undergraduate and graduate students who have been diagnosed with diabetes.

MoldNJ.net Scholarship
Sponsor: Mold Removal Experts
Amount: $750
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to U.S. citizens and permanent residents who are accepted or enrolled in a university, college, or graduate program in the United States with at least a 3.0 GPA. Applicant must submit an essay on a given topic related to preparing for a natural disaster.

MyCDLapp.com Scholarship
Sponsor: MyCDLApp.com
Amount: Up to $2,500
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to current undergraduate and graduate students pursuing a degree in Human Resources or Business Management at an accredited college or university in the United States.

National Ag Day Photo Contest
Sponsor: Agriculture Council of America
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Contest is open to students in college in the United States. Student must submit an original photo on the contest theme: “Agriculture Food For Life.”

 

mh“Check out Miranda’s House.The Mission of Marion’s House is to Interrupt the cycle of Child Sexual Abuse with E.A.R (Empowerment, Awareness, and Recovery.)

You began surviving the movement you realised you didn’t have to be a victim”
-Miranda Burton

New Orleans Ghosts Scholarship
Sponsor: New Orleans Ghost Tours
Amount: $250
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to any student enrolled in an accredited college. Applicant must submit an essay sharing information about their educational goals and why they deserve the scholarship

Nutrition Inspector Scholarship
Sponsor: Nutrition Inspector
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to college students currently enrolled in courses related to diet, fitness, and nutrition.

One Shot Scholarship
Sponsor: One Shot Outdoors, LLC
Amount: $500
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to high school seniors and current college students. Applicant must submit completed application and an essay describing their dream, goal, or passion.

(When you get all of that money, why not invest a little on your wardrobe? Lula Roe’s fabric is the bomb! It’s so comy! I got me three of them. I love the fact that no one else will have pants like mine) Please use the link below to chick out this moms business page.

 

lr

LulaRoe By Bali Mitchell

 

ORB Annual College Scholarship
Sponsor: Online Resume Builders
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to domestic and international students enrolled, or due to be enrolled, in full-time university education for the semester they are receiving the scholarship (Spring 2017). Applicant must create a resume for anyone.

Prime Scholarship
Sponsor: Prime Medical Alert
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to students working towards a two-year or four-year Nursing degree.

Prompt Scholarship Essay Contest
Sponsor: Prompt.com
Amount: Up to $10,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to students 16 years of age or older who are currently applying for an undergraduate degree at an accredited institution within the United States or Canada in 2017 (or 2018 if taking a gap year). Applicant can use any essay they have written as part of a college application. Scholarship is open every month until December 15. Each monthly winner will then have a chance for a $10,000 scholarship.


Damsel In Defense
Make sure your child (ren) are protected on campusmi

Judy Harris
Damsel Protege
PHONE: (828)247-6375
stunninpepper@gmail.com
My Events | About Me

 

 

QuikshipToner.com Student Scholarship
Sponsor: QuikshipToner.com
Amount: $1,500
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to undergraduate and graduate students who attend an American college, university or trade school. Applicant must submit an essay on a given topic related to the printing industry.

Rare Disease Scholarship Program
Sponsor: XpertDox
Amount: $750
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to current undergraduate and graduate students who have an interest in medical related research (including public health) or patient care (medicine, nursing, pharmacology or nutrition). Applicant must submit an essay on a given topic related to rare diseases.

Resume Genius Annual Scholarship
Sponsor: Resume Genius
Amount: $1,000
Closing Date: December 15, 2016
Description: Scholarship is open to students enrolled, or due to be enrolled, in full-time university education for the semester they are applying for the scholarship. Applicant must create a resume based on the life of any fictional or non-fictional character, from TV, history, literature or myth.

 

chic

2016-17 Graduation- Family Milestone

I am floating on cloud nine right about now!  By many accounts, I should not be where I am. I should not be married. I shouldn’t have smart children, nor should they be graduating, especially from college! BUT GOD!

This year, I have been honored to have not one, but 4 graduates to celebrate. My husband, my oldest son, and two of my daughters. It was not planned or budgeted. But think goodness for the life style we have. Because of that reason alone we are gonna celebrate in the most grand way possible. After all, how often do you get 4 graduates in one year?

 

My graduates- Raj- Husband- Army Veteran, Central Piedmont Community College/CPCC –  Elementary Education majorIMG_5125-001

My oldest son- Jervon jervon                 Basketball MVP, Hampton University, Hampton VA.  B.S. Liberal Arts

Below is a clip from one of his recent games at Hampton University. Watch here!

 

My 2nd oldest daughter- JC        Working Teen, Hemingway High, College bound- She hasn’t decided what she wants to do as of yet. jcp

My 3rd oldest daughter- DeeDua , teenpernuer,  Providence High School Trade School Paralegal Studies dee

 

I’m so proud of each of them. Each of them were born with obstacles to overcome. From being the child of a single mom to starting life on this side some 4 months early. As they say the tassel was worth the hassle. They made it! Who else is celebrating a graduate? The video below is of a Momsrising friend of mine. She was sharing some motivational tips for my daughter DeeDua. Listen in!

I am so proud of each of my scholars. I know they are prepared for whatever life throws at them. My hope is that the younger one will follow their path and not mine as it relates to student loans. Going to college for free is a blessing. My husband education was sponsored by the Veteran administration. My son attended all four years under a athletic scholarship. My daughters had to search and apply for hundreds of grants and scholarships. The money is out there. You can get some too!

Get FREE Money for college! Click the  image below to see he most current collection.   Find_Scholarship_Money

Mama’s Cinco De Mayo Deals & Details

Cinco de Mayo Is Not Mexican Independence Day! That’s ok, you can still celebrate!

We choose to celebrate because we love spicy tacos, fun music and bright colors!

http://ti.me/21oalEd

“It (Cinco de Mayo) started out as a cultural celebration, then became bigger and bigger,” said Sánchez. “And at some point it became very commercial; with people taking advantage of the day to drink all the Coronas they can drink.”

Today marks the 154th anniversary of Cinco de Mayo, a bicultural celebration. For us, it’s a great way to teach the children about the Latino cultural and have a little fun at the same time.

Cinco de Mayo is the celebration of the courage of the Mexican people during the battle (La Batalla de Puebla) on May 5th, 1862 where 4,500 Mexican soldiers defeated the Mexican traitors (exiled Mexican Convervatives) and French army of 6,500 at Puebla, Mexico . The reasons why Cinco de Mayo is celebrated on a much larger scale in the United States is maybe because :

  • If it had not been for the victory, France would have aided the South in the American Civil War and this would have an impact on the war.
  • Chicanos celebrates this day in appreciation of its cultural and historical significance.
  • General Ignacio Zaragosa was born in Texas when it was still part of Mexico and is considered to be a Chicano hero.
 So in honor of all our Latino friends everywhere…… this collection is for you!
Crafts for today! – A pinata!!!
 
QC SuperMomJamba Juice
With a coupon available on Jamba Juices website starting May 4, guests nationwide can celebrate the holiday with a Chili Mango or Mango-A-Go-Go Smoothie for $2.99. (The smoothies normally cost $5 and up.) The coupon is valid May 4-8.
Like · Reply · Commented on by JabeLa Ledsi · 2 mins
QC SuperMom
QC SuperMom(3rd Party info) Cinco de Mayo Margarita Deals, Taco Specials and More
An estimated 87.3 million pounds of avocados are consumed per year on May 5, according to the California Avocado Commission and tequila sales at U.S. bars and restaurants more than double. This year, save money on your Cinco de Mayo drink and food purchases with these special offers.
Bahama Breeze: Get $5 margaritas all day on May 5.
Chili’s: Celebrate Drinko de Mayo at Chili’s with $3 Dos Equis and $5 Presidente marLettuce Leaf Tacos | "This was soo good my kids (ages 6 and 10) asked me to make it next week! This is a first." -Michellepv: garitas.
Chipotle: Take $50 off any catering order for 20 or more people on Cinco de Mayo.
DoorDash: Sign up for DoorDash to get $5 off your first delivery and in certain cities, you can have Taco Bell delivered to your doorstep on Cinco de Mayo and every day.
Eat24: Use coupon code RELAX to get $2 off your order until Dec. 31, allowing you to get a Cinco de Mayo discount without leaving your couch.
Green Burrito: Buy one Burrito El Diablo and get a second free with this printable coupon through May 31.
Jamba Juice: Get a small Mango A-Go-Go or Chili Mango smoothie for $2.99 with this coupon until May 8.
Mad Mex: Enjoy breakfast burritos, eggchiladas and cornbread starting at 9 a.m. as part of the Mad Mex Cinco de Mayo party. All day drink specials include 22-ounce Dos Equis drafts for $5 and a $1 off all Mexican bottles and cans. Regular happy hour and late nght specials will be honored, in addition to some special games and giveaways.
Moe’s Southwest Grill: As part of its annual Cinco de Moe’s event, the first 100 customers in line will receive a free t-shirt while supplies last and participating locations will offer $5 burritos.
On the Border: Enjoy 14-ounce Cinco Cup House Margaritas for $4, 14-ounce Cinco Cup Dos Equis Lager, Dos Equis Amber and Corona Light Drafts for $3, a variety of Cinco Shots for $2 to $4, Dos Equis Lager, Corona and Corona Light bottles for $3 and commemorative t-shirts for $10 at participating locations.
Papa Murphy’s: The Steak Fajita and Taco Grande pizzas are both back until May 30.
Rubio’s: Get a free Taquitos Platter with any catering purchase of $125 or more.
Sonic Drive-In: Get 6- or 12-piece boneless wings for half price on May 5.
Taco Bueno: Party Tacos will be half price — $0.59 — all day.
Taco Cabana: Enjoy happy hour on Cinco de Mayo from 4 p.m. to 7 p.m., featuring $1.50 margaritas and a $3 small nacho and margarita combo. Additionally, Taco Cabana will celebrate Seis de Mayo by receiving one free breakfast taco when you dine-in during breakfast hours from May 6 to May 8.
Taco Del Mar: Take part in the annual Cinco de Mayo 5 pound burrito eating challenge at participating locations.
Taco Mayo: A new mystery item will be added to the menu on Cinco de Mayo 2016.
TacoTime: Get $0.69 crisp tacos all day on May 5.
TGI Friday’s: Get $5 margaritas and $3 appetizers on May 5.
Tijuana Flats: Enjoy 48 hours of Cinco de Mayo specials, including a Tijuana Burrito, chips and a drink for $5, with the option to add a draft beer for $1 on May 5 and $2 tacos on May 6.
Tumbleweed Tex Mex Grill & Margarita Bar: Start the weekend early with $0.99 domestic drafts — premium drafts not included — and Twisted Teas. Additionally, domestic longnecks will be $1.99.

“Cinco de Mayo is part of the Latino experience of the American Civil War,”

Like · Reply · Commented on by JabeLa Ledsi · 3 mins

 

QC SuperMom
QC SuperMomCaribou Coffee
Caribou Coffee is renaming May 5 “Drink-O de Mayo” as the day when it introduces its new Caribou Coolers, an ice-blended drink perfect for summer. To celebrate the launch, consumers can try all three of the new Cooler flavors—Salted Caramel, Mint Chocolate and Raspberry.
 https://youtu.be/0xbyz5nbwnQ
Click these links for more details–

Friday Four: Is Your Birthday December 25th?

A lot of people are gonna hate me for this one. Some businesses will too, but it must be said. Christmas is not your child’s birthday, why do you struggle over one day? It completely defeats the spirit of the season.xmas

I had great Christmas as a child. My parents got us something every year. Not huge things, like a car or the latest sneakers but nice gifts. I remember my ET doll, the handheld Nintendo games, the Pretty Cut and Grow doll and  as I got older,  cash. Now ask me about my birthdays and I’ll tell you how special I always felt that one week in October! I’m so grateful they kept it in perspective for us.

With kids, it can be tricky and sometimes pointless to explain your budget, goals and situation. But you gotta do it. I’ve seen first hand how the good intentions of parents and other loved ones can quickly go bad. …… Yeeees, I’ll explain why.

1. Parents are teaching their children to be materialistic. If you are gonna shop, buy something they really need. Something that will make them a better person spiritually, educationally, nutritionally, physically, financially or even environmentally.

Give, Me Give Me Give Me. I know a parent that has one child. The child does no work in school or at home but trust and believe, that child has over $1200 in Christmas gifts coming to him. I asked why would you spend that much on him and he’s not doing the basic chores of being a child and the dad said because he’s my only son. After that comment, I reached for my glass of tea, like Kermit.’

2. Parents borrowing money to buy expensive gifts.  Would you believe that some parents take out loans for Christmas shopping? Showing love should never be so crippling. Debt is a form of slavery you know. slave

3 Are you really gonna give someone else credit for putting that huge smile on your child’s face? (I can’t do it. I work waaaaay to hard for that to happen)

4. You’re lying to your child.  There is no Santa! It’s ok,  to teach your children that charity begins at home.

santa

Langston Paterson- from South L.A.

I already know that the in laws, aunts and uncles are gonna  buy them something.  When it happens, we will  graciously accept it. Then say, “I’m surprised by your present. We had agreed not to do this, so I don’t have one for you in return.” Thank you.”  Make sure not to buy the person a gift in return (until their birthday or if out and see something really affordable that hey need or like). Your word is your word; be true to it.

To me, Christmas is about spending quality time with my family, listening to the kids play and argue, cooking with my children and getting some extra sleep while the older kids and/ my husband take the smaller kids out.  All of the years that I spent buying Christmas gifts were not lost, it just took me time to evolve into appreciating time with my family as the most important gift that I could possibly receive and give them. (After loosing a daughter you realize that time is the most precious gift! )

It’s also about serving others in need. As a matter of fact, myself and a few awesome humans are going scarf bombing this weekend in a local park.  Wanna join us? CLICK HERE!111aaa

Happy Holidays everyone!

Jabela, QC Supermom

 

Kids in the QC, Valentine’s Day Party!!

Bring out the Minions! We are gonna have a ball! Our Valentines’s Day Party for kids in the QC is getting on or roll!!

Every year it get’s better! And to think, it all powered by Charlotte moms!!! Queen City Stay At Home Moms to be specific.

The first thing we did was bring back our guest from last year. They deserve it. Our venue was overbooked & I was notified 2 days before the event and although we found another venue, and still had fun, it was not the same. We felt awful about it! So bringing them back for free was just a result of good upbringing.

This is our 3rd year.

Here’s 2013- It’s theme was A Veggie Sweet Day  . It was at Monkey Joes and the kids had  unlimited access to the bounce houses during the party!

Here’s 2014- it’s theme was “Disney Side Love”- the goodie bags were a hit with parents and their small well dressed characters alike!

minions-quotesThis year’s theme is Minions! The children will LOVE it! Having a dedicated Pinterest board does help as well!  This year we added a karaoke Dj and invited one of Charlotte best family centered non profit service organizations to join in.

If you have children, do not miss this party! Everyone is welcome! But you gotta get your tickets!  Follow along on Facebook for more updates.  See you soon!

Your Mom Maven in the QC,

Jabela,  QC Supermom

Minions-Quotes-Images-Wallpaper-Pics-27Can’t wait to use these online tools for promotions:

MInion Images

Minion Facts

Get your celebration started! Check out my $5* Minion Shop. It’s loaded with really cute affiliates links to some awesome Minions gifts, games and decor! game minUnisex Two Eyes Crochet Hat Ski Cap Black Friday Cyber Monday

Despicable Me In-ear Headphones Earbuds for Mobile Phone Mp3 Minions Dave Carl 3.5mm Earphones Quality Sound Includes 3 Additional Earplug Covers – Great for Kids, Boys, Girls, Adults, Gifts

Memory Game Despicable Me Edition

MINIONS – Minion GOGGLES

Despicable Me Tattoos, 24ct

Despicable Me Minion Mini Tin Tote Box 4.125″x 5.5″ x 2.5″

Peeking Minions (9″ x 3-1/4″) Die Cut Decal Bumper Sticker For WIndows, Cars, Trucks, Etc.

 

 

The Muslim-African Wedding

If you are ever invited to and African wedding and it says the ceremony will begin at 3pm, show up at 5pm and you may beat the bride and groom there.

Over the weekend I attended a African-Muslim wedding and was honored for the experience. I didn’t know what to expect from an Muslim-African infused ceremony, so I did a little research before attending.

Although many Muslims stage a multiday celebration to mark a wedding, the traditional marriage ritual itself, called a nikah in Arabic, is simple and brief. It generally follows these steps:

At the wedding, which can take place pretty much anywhere, the bride and groom are separated in different rooms. They may or may not be able to see each other, depending on how conservative the families are.

An officiant, who can be any man familiar with Islamic law, heads to each room separately. There he asks the spouses-to-be if they consent to the marriage and if they are marrying of their own free will (a representative called a wali answers the officiant’s questions on the bride’s behalf).

The couple signs the marriage contract or license, with witnesses observing.

The officiant brings the pair together and pronounces them husband and wife.

The first thing I noticed  at the mosque was that the women and men sat separate from each other. Even the engage couple.  There was no wedding party and everything was pleasantly different than anything else I’ve ever seen before.  There was no solos, flowers girls, no bridal party walking in. As a matter of fact the engaged couple was seated for the entire ceremony until the dowry part. They did kiss at the end.

IMG_20151121_202932.jpg

I took my daughter with me. 

Now can we talk about the reception. More importantly the food! It was everything I ever hope for in a African reception. Joloff, spicy meats, crisp salads…..even the drinks were amazing. I loved the African Ginger beer. (Click here for the recipe1448154690709

Ok, ok, ok, I won’t show my love of African food before I give you more details. –The reception included a very lively African dance by a all female group. I didn’t know  one word that was said, but their movement was very much so lovely and graceful!  Now when the families got on the floor, it was a wrap! I took off my shoes and got down with them! They know how to parrrrr-ty!  Line dances, couple dances, man dances…… it was amazing! Little did I know, Mrs Bride is a Delta. One of her sisters gave her the sweetest token of love in song (lip syncing)1448232600830

As the night progressed I seen first hand why this marriage will work. The families are loving.PURELY LOVING. The husband LOVES his new daughters. The husbands family LOVES their new daughter.AND THE NEW COUPLE adores each other.  I’m so glad I brought my daughter with me.

What I was most impressed with is how they spent their money. Nothing was over the top except for those dresses the bride wore. They were incredibly beautiful. Nothing was lacking. I think they did a great job  on the ceremony. I am so elated to have been a part of it ,and wish them nothing but the very best. Sorry, I haven’t shared any videos or closer photos. I haven’t received permission to release wedding details as of posting date. Once received, I’ll share them on our Facebook page (click here to go there now.)1448154689495

Here’s more on

The Sweetheart Song by DELTA’s

another tear jerking Sweetheart song by the Deltas

Islamic weddings

African Weddings

African Wedding Food

Liberian Pineapple Ginger Beer

Baba Doula

A few years ago I was surfing on Facebook. I came across a name that really intrigued me. It was a guy named Baba Doula!

He had the sweetest family and the most adorable little girl. So I felt comfortable approaching him. It did help that he was  socially conscious and  knew people in high places…..(and who doesn’t LOVE Ms Erykah She Ill Badu?)

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The name alone made me  search through his profile to learn more about him. I looked through pictures, comments on his timeline , and even his friend list to get a better sense what type of person he was. He checked out to be a really upstanding fella so I befriended him and quickly asked,  “What’s up with that name?  The conversation went like this:

ME: Morning Baba. Are you a doula? Your name is throwing me off.
Free em all! Lol… Allow me to try and explain Sis.
ME: Lol, I’m listening….
Did you see the post on my time line from 17 JAN about jailed father for daughters vaccination?

I didn’t  see it but I quickly went to find it. Some time later,  I engaged him again. This time it was to learn more about his passion for birthing, life and if possible, more about him as a husband.  So he shared: 

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I’m Baba Doula!  My nom de plume, my moniker, which like our child was conceived / created out of love. As you know, Baba means father and Doula is one who serves a woman doing childbirth. I am a husband, and a father to a darling little girl named Tsage. It never even occurred to me the all of the struggles a woman must go through before, during, and after childbirth. When we found out we were with child, I began reading, watching, and educating myself to the point of passing out and having nightmares literally. Prenatal DVDs, cooking fine cuisines, mediation, bonding, Bradley Method childbirth class. It was King Solomon who said, “There’s nothing new under the sun.” Old African birthing wisdom, such as squatting during labor, moving around freely, being able to eat and drink freely, and relaxing has been repackaged into an expensive birthing class. But thankfully, friends of ours donated half the money so we could take it. We also procured a doula to augment my own support during labor. Lastly, we hired a placenta encapsulation specialist to ensure a smooth postpartum transition. And although I am not the one who gives birth, my politics do, and is shaped from the reality by those who did, and those who continue to bring life into this world.
ME: You mentioned ” We have slight generational and culture parenting differences.” Everyone doesn’t agree with me…… But I’m curious…… what do you think is the biggest difference?
Months later I engaged him again. He then shared.
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I grew up in the 80’s and she grew up in the 90’s. James from Good Times was my “TV Dad.” While she had Bill Cosby. It wasn’t frowned upon to spank your child. Ash don’t believe in spanking, she hasn’t seen a House Party film either. So sweeping a broom over your foot, cutting the seat out of old panties, keeping a piece of salt pork on top of the Frigidaire as medicine, sayings like “don’t let the hide go with the tallow”, using a piece of straw broom as a tooth pick, etc. are all foreign to her.

Did you see the post on my time line from 17 JAN about jailed father for daughters vaccination? Yes? That was him 🙂

Baba is all man, but his foundation is reminiscent of mine. It wasn’t long ago that I stood up for all breastfeeding moms in the Charlotte Mecklenburg Public Library. He is the type of person I would send my mommy and daddy friends to when my husband is worn out from responding to parenting and social questions. Well, the good news is I persuaded him to increase his profound presence to the ones that need it the most!

Help me welcome BaBa Doula to QC Supermom!!! We are so happy to have his perspective in our pubic, liberal,  holistic,  community! Let the fun begin!2222

Baba is available for family centered product reviews, daddy consultations and even speaking events! Learn more about this cool cat on our page. Click HERE !

Thrilled from The Windy City to The Queen City,

Jabela

The Father’s Day Hunt

Every mom has been there before. It’s hours before Father’s Day and you have NOTHING to give as a gift. No time to panic! Pull it together and get those juices flowing is the mission for today!

Cassies sweetz king-of-duct-tape-fathers-day-cupakes

I haven’t asked the children what they want yet because they have been so busy helping me get better from this muscle spasm in my back and ovaries. But It just so happens that they are all away and that gives me time to brain storm via Pinterest, Google, and magazine for ideas!

So I’m looking for something

  • Reusabledads gifts in jars
  • Yummy
  • Funny
  • Simple

and most of all affordable!

I liked this key chain

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He would wear this. it’s not to dressy or flashy. Just like my husband. Just as this T-shirt. Simple, Strong and really eye candy!  Now the children will also want to gift him. I have put together an entiredad_the_man_great_gift_for_fathers_day_tshirt-r8315cc44627e4c7bae74bb1529391fe5_vj7bu_324

Pinteret board for that. Starting with this cute idea here!

I think you have the idea!.Hopefully this will be another great celebration of our guy! He does so much for us and to not celebrate him on such a  thoughtful day is just selfish. Love is an action and we have an overabundance of it to share!

My Earthly Dad

With these three words,
“Dear Heavenly Father,”
I begin my every prayer,
But the man I see
While on bended knee
Is always my earthly dad.

He is the image
Of the Father divine
Reflecting the nature of God,
For his love and care
And the faith he shared
Pointed me to my Father above.

daddy and QC Supermom

Adios friends

QC Supermom