Friday Four: Graduation and Absent Parents

High School Graduation  brings all types of newness. step parents affirm

I have a classmate that gave her daughter to a community friend. This year she graduated from high school and I was so pleasantly surprised to see here there supporting her child. It signified a a new chapter for them both. No matter what happened in the past,she was there and her child needed that. Another classmate of mine told me her nieces mom didn’t even showed up and the graduate actually cried on her BIG day.  What I want to share with any absent parent, let go of the ego and get your child!  Unless you are a creep, molester, etc,. the current guardian can no longer keep you from your child.  Yes, honey, it’s YOUR TIME TO bond!

Need help making it happen? I got you. Here’s FOUR ways To To Take Advantage Of This bonding Opportunity:

  1. Apologize for everything. Some things could have happened and you may not be aware of it.It may not even be your fault. Something could have happened completely out of your control. Own up to it.Gone on, claim your ‘ish.  Sort through all of it.But don’t put blame completely on the child and other guardian*
  2. Answer Offer to Answer any and all questions she/her may have. You’ll be embarrassed,but keep the end goals in mind. Sometimes you have to “UNTIE KNOTS “to get on a smoother road. Now is that time.
  3. Ask for a relationship. Don’t be crazy and ask her/him to call you mamma/daddy, but ask can we build some type of relationship from here.
  4. Find ways to be significant. You already know your child will need a mini fridge. Go buy it. Create a pintrest page to share with her/him. Keep it updated with college tips and advice. Send monthly care packages, Send gift cards to local venues/attractions in her /his college town. Whatever you do, keep sincere. While you will never make up for lost time, you most certainly can create a special relationship with your child that will never be broken. When she celebrate- you celebrate. When she upset, you find ways to put a smile on her face that no one else can.

sow-001

These are my personal tips. They are working so far for me. Met my number 3.(yes, I altered her face)  She and I are building a real bond now.I know in my heart, she’s another reason why my professional services create more opportunities for me to be in her life. I’m not wasting the opportunities.  I’ll let you know how that goes!

 

Wednesday Wow: I Do’ Too! Solemization

It’s Summer and officially wedding season! If you’re in North or South Carolina, I’m ya girl!

Okay, so what began as a way to bring more money into the home, has grown to something so much more. Yes, I’m creating marriages, but I’m also creating more  ways to be a part of my children life. That really excites me!

It cost me less than $200 and I can use this new asset in all 50 states for the rest of my life. To all my mama friends, readers- you gotta do it!

I’m still getting used to being called Minister Kelle, because I am a southerner, and grew up thinking of ministers sorta differently. But then I thought about it and said to myself, “Girl, you’re more real than a lot of them out there. -Girl You Good!”

So with my ordination, I can do many things.besides solemnize a wedding  I could also:

  1. Perform A Baptism/ Welcome To The World Ceremony

  2.  Preside Over A Funeral

  3. Be A Chaplain

    We can touch the lives of others in a prison or hospital. Sick and dying patients in hospitals around the country have been comforted by our church’s members, and prison officials actively encourage those who are eager to bring religion to others to come to their institutions and rehabilitate their inmates.

  4. Start A Church ( I know right? Wow!)

  5.  Ordain others

    The perfect couple for me would be laid back, spiritual but not too religious, fun loving , don’t have a church home and most times open minded.

For me, it’s important to know the couple and meet them way before they get to the altar.I want to know if couple has any religious or cultural rituals that they want to include. Do they want to break a glass? Jump a broom? Do they want to include any Buddhist poetry? Will there be any readings or songs in the ceremony? Of course I offer counseling, but it’s not required. But I will pray with the couple before the wedding and commit to pray for them all the way to the wedding day.

 And I was thinking, for now, I’ll offer my services to the moms of Queen City Stay At Home Moms at a discount as a member perk. Everyone else $220 for a basic service and rehearsal rate. I really don’t think   I would marry anyone out of the Carolina’s.
Which works out fine based on the research I’ve done already. It is said, that in

North Carolina:   Marriage Officiants:/ordained minister of any faith who is authorized to perform marriages by his church may do so.

In North Carolina, I must return the license in SC….. the couple can once completed,return the license to its office of issuance (usually by mail) within 30 days of the wedding. The license is then recorded by the state and the marriage becomes a legal binding contract.

Marriage in South Carolina is governed by Chapter 1 of Title 20 of South Carolina’s Code of Laws.

SECTION 20-1-20. Persons who may perform marriage ceremony.

Only ministers of the Gospel, Jewish rabbis, officers authorized to administer oaths in this State, and the chief or spiritual leader of a Native American Indian entity recognized by the South Carolina Commission for Minority Affairs pursuant to Section 1-31-40 are authorized to administer a marriage ceremony in this State

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HERE! Cute wedding Script- < HERE> Beautiful Wedding script.   More Wedding Info —-here

Need wedding ceremony scripts? Click here.  Here’s some fair trade companies…..
What to Ask Your Wedding Officiant Here & Here !  My last reading on the industry-here

 

2016-17 Graduation- Family Milestone

I am floating on cloud nine right about now!  By many accounts, I should not be where I am. I should not be married. I shouldn’t have smart children, nor should they be graduating, especially from college! BUT GOD!

This year, I have been honored to have not one, but 4 graduates to celebrate. My husband, my oldest son, and two of my daughters. It was not planned or budgeted. But think goodness for the life style we have. Because of that reason alone we are gonna celebrate in the most grand way possible. After all, how often do you get 4 graduates in one year?

 

My graduates- Raj- Husband- Army Veteran, Central Piedmont Community College/CPCC –  Elementary Education majorIMG_5125-001

My oldest son- Jervon jervon                 Basketball MVP, Hampton University, Hampton VA.  B.S. Liberal Arts

Below is a clip from one of his recent games at Hampton University. Watch here!

 

My 2nd oldest daughter- JC        Working Teen, Hemingway High, College bound- She hasn’t decided what she wants to do as of yet. jcp

My 3rd oldest daughter- DeeDua , teenpernuer,  Providence High School Trade School Paralegal Studies dee

 

I’m so proud of each of them. Each of them were born with obstacles to overcome. From being the child of a single mom to starting life on this side some 4 months early. As they say the tassel was worth the hassle. They made it! Who else is celebrating a graduate? The video below is of a Momsrising friend of mine. She was sharing some motivational tips for my daughter DeeDua. Listen in!

I am so proud of each of my scholars. I know they are prepared for whatever life throws at them. My hope is that the younger one will follow their path and not mine as it relates to student loans. Going to college for free is a blessing. My husband education was sponsored by the Veteran administration. My son attended all four years under a athletic scholarship. My daughters had to search and apply for hundreds of grants and scholarships. The money is out there. You can get some too!

Get FREE Money for college! Click the  image below to see he most current collection.   Find_Scholarship_Money

QC Supermom’s 2015 in review

I think we’ve done pretty well. Thank you for coming along! Check out my reach. With YOUR help I made it to China and other amazing places!

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 8,200 times in 2015. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 3 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

And I DOULA!

I was asked during a recent interview,“How do you handle being a doula when you have young kids?” My answer:I love what I do, I have an supportive family and a wonderful gym membership!” (read more on that here: )  Jabela the doula

I think most moms would do well at it! The truth is, giving birth is strikingly similar to mothering: It’s usually chaotic, sometimes stressful, rarely pretty, never easy. You might feel like you’re failing even when you’re not; sometimes, it will feel impossible. But you’ll press through anyway, because forward is the only option. When you do, your doula will be with you. Not just because she’s been there, but because she loves it and lives it!

For those who do not know what a dolua is I’ll explain. Benefits of a Doula

A doula is “a woman who serves” and is now used to refer to a trained and experienced professional who provides continuous physical, emotional and informational support to the mother before, during and just after birth; or who provides emotional and practical support during the postpartum period.

A Birth Doula  Ashley hired  doula Jabelaa

  • Recognizes birth as a key experience the mother will remember all her life
  • Understands the physiology of birth and the emotional needs of a woman in labor
  • Assists the woman in preparing for and carrying out her plans for birth
  • Stays with the woman throughout the labor
  • Provides emotional support, physical comfort measures and an objective viewpoint, as well as helping the woman get the information she needs to make informed decisions
  • Facilitates communication between the laboring woman, her partner and her clinical care providers
  • Perceives her role as nurturing and protecting the woman’s memory of the birth experience
  • Allows the woman’s partner to participate at his/her comfort level

Research evidence shows that the quality services of a postpartum doula can ease the transition that comes with the addition of a baby to a family, improve parental satisfaction and reduce the risk of mood disorders.

 

A Postpartum Doula

  • Offers education, companionship and nonjudgmental support during the postpartum fourth trimester
  • Assists with newborn care, family adjustment, meal preparation and light household tidying
  • Offers evidence-based information on infant feeding, emotional and physical recovery from birth, infant soothing and coping skills for new parents and makes appropriate referrals when necessary

Postpartum doula

It’s World Doula Week -Mar ch 22-28th

The purpose of World Doula Week (“WDW”) is to empower doulas all over the world to improve the physiological, social, emotional, and psychological health of women, newborns and families in birth and in the postpartum period.

Here’s a little more information onAshley -with Jabela the  Doula

postpartum-recovery

My doula service, The Pink Grasshopper is named after my oldest daughter.  I have great holistic mom /baby supplies over there.

I’m on Twitter too. Follow me over here also. I’ll start a few raffles soon once I get some traffic over there .

Check out my Pinterest Board!It’s LOADED with hard to find birthing information!

Need to increase your milk supply? Buy these awesome lactation treats! Cassie is a teen baker from Charlotte NC and makes all sorts of GMO, Vegan and Organic treats!  – Cassie Sweetz

Now Go Have A baby and call me in the morning,

QC Supermom

Friday Four: Just Dance!

I love dancing. I don’t know what took me so long to include it in my exercise regime. I have to cook. It takes me at least 45 minutes to get it all done. Why haven’t I been pumping up the jam to help get these hips down?

pizza

See my Pinterest board on easy foods for kids!

 

It just came together the other night while over the stove. My daughter strolls in the kitchen with The Fuggees; ‘ Ready Or Not’ playing on her phone. Mannnnnn, I got the feeling and had to dance it out!

The kids were amused as my husband walked in and did his little Fred Sanford’ jig, but I really didn’t care. I was back in college with my boxed braids in my hair, getting down with my girls, at the off -campus house party! Those were the days!

So why should you dance IN the kitchen WHILE cooking WITH your children? Here’s FOUR reasons to try it:

1. On the smooth surface floor, you’ll move smoother. That alone is priceless. With little effort, you’ll look like J-lo, James Brown, any of them – EVER!  (I need that support in my life.)

2. Your steps are flawless. Think limber and fluid…..My daughter was trying to get dance lessons from me.

3. You can have fun while >< Get This><……… exercising! I think 30 minutes 4 times a week gotta add up!

4. Your little ones will LOVE jamming with you. THEY WILL LOVE IT!  Dancing with mommy?! What child wouldn’t? See for yourself!

I gotta go, these hips won’t trim themselves down.

~QC Supermom

Friday Four: What To Do While Waiting On The Snow

I said “Brrrrr! It’s cold in here! It must be a Tiger in the atmosphere!” YES, it’s a corny old school day cheer, but it is definitely cold in the QC. So settle in and stay there. Charlotte, NC has closed for the week! 

Organo Gold Now Delivers Healthy Coffee to Your DoorNortherners make jokes about how we southerners react to a “little snow.” But we rarely get snow down here in Charlotte NC. When the news folks began to talk about the white gold, the children and I got excited while my husband begins his search for batteries!

So while he’s running around like a mad man, I’ll tell you about my top four ideas to help you enjoy this cold and shut in weather! They were inspired by my QC Supermom FB friends.

 Fashion Misfit1. Well if you have a significant other, then lucky you.  The cold weather means wanted body contact. Cuddle on the couch with a few good movies,light snacks, and a warm blanket. OR you could turn up the music to your favorite music artist and just relax. Two of my friends are doing just that. One just shared on QC Supermom that she is listening to Bob Marley on Spotfy… sippin wine. Thinking about all of the above makes me all warm and fuzzy on the inside!

cuffing weather

Make sure Fido is warm if he/she sleeps outside.

 

2. Catch up with back logged work. Sure, it’s not as fun, but it’s still a smart move. Just about all of your questions can be answered by third parties because they too have little to do today. My friend Ed, from The Preparedness Consulting group is doing his taxes, getting ready for his next trade show and completing some new home made laundry detergent. A momperneur friend of mine, from Fashion MisFit is getting a head start on her next big order of customized purses.

 Preparedness Consulting Group, LLC

3.” We made “Casuela de Cerdo” a pork and potato stew .. Hot tea.. And movies … I am going to do some sewing tomorrow! ” said Jessica.  I like the idea of trying new recipes also.

4.Have your children perform’ Karaoke Night’ for you! My babies LOVE to entertain me.  It is by far the best and most affordable entertainment in town. The video below was from Thanksgiving. They entered my work-space so I watched them dance. 🙂

Whatever you do, stay safe, warm, inside, prepared, and connected to others!

~QC Supermom

ssnow

More on :

Healthy tea, and coffee by Organo Gold.

Being Prepared by Ed Godka & The Preparedness Consulting Group LLC.

Customized fashions and designs by Fashion Misfit USA-

Wednesday WOW: Let’s Get The Kids In The Kitchen.

four little boys cookingInvolving your kids in the kitchen enhances their appreciation and basic knowledge of different foods and good nutrition. You can teach them safe ways to handle food as well as simple cooking techniques. Plus, the time spent together is invaluable family time and encourages a lifetime of healthy eating.8 yr old shredding cheese

I like to look in various magazines, cookbook newspaper ads,, and even old menus for inspiration on what to cook. Now don’t get me wrong, I have also passed by other people and have secretly drooled at what they are indulging.

For us, not much is off limits. There are many ways to make just about everything healthier and tastier to enjoy.

Here’s how my large family create a healthy meal together.

1. We look to see what we have and note what we need. Coupons can be grabbed from the Sunday paper and online. In the fridge, we look for:

            1. Freshness
            2. Enough  of the ingredient for the recipe
            3. Something everyone can and will want to eat.

2.We determine who will do what. This is based on each ones age and ability to safely follow directions. There are six children in the home ranging from two to sixteen; a helper or two is never hard to find.

For most children you can give the following kitchen jobs:

2-4- year olds children can stir, roll, and even mash ingredients in a large deep bowl. This age group, however, needs very close adult supervision since their dexterity and motor skills are still developing.

5-7  year olds can help with reading  recipes, measuring, juicing, and prepping, and gathering certain ingredients. They may still need reminders to watch their fingers during grating and peeling.

8-11 year olds can cut, use specialty appliances like the panini press, waffle, ice cream maker, bigger knives and maybe even able to roast veggies. Now with a grasp of some basic cooking skills and an appreciation for the rules of the kitchen, young cooks are ready to take on more complex tasks using more kitchen equipment.  Of course, close and constant supervision are required at all times.

12 & up* This group can place and remove food from the oven, and even help create a healthy menu for an entire  week.

Here’s one of our weekly meals. Lasagna

Ingredients:Young boy cooking pasta

  • 1 pound dry pasta
  • 1 onion, chopped
  • 1/2 garlic clove chopped
  • 1 pound lean ground turkey* (meat is optional- we use meat alternatives)
  • 2 (26 ounce) jars spaghetti sauce
  • 8 ounces muenster cheese (we dice it our self to save money)
  • 8 ounces mozzarella cheese (we dice it our self to save money)
  • Sprinkles of salt, flax seeds,and pepper to taste

four  year old cookingDirections-

  • Bring a large pot of lightly salted water to a boil. Add pasta, and cook until al dente, about 8 minutes; drain.In a large skillet, brown onion and “crumbled meat” over medium heat. Add spaghetti sauce, and simmer 15 minutes. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).  Butter a 9×13 inch baking dish.
  • Layer as follows: 1/2 of the pasta, mixed cheeses,1/2 sauce mixture, remaining mixed pasta, cheeses and remaining sauce mixture. Top with grated Parmesan cheese.
  • Bake for 30 minutes in the preheated oven, or until cheeses are melted.five year old cooking

Tilapia and Green Tea

Why teach children how to cook?

  • Cooking can be a fun time to bond with your kids, as well teach basic cooking education(importance of proper food safety practices, including food storage and kitchen hygiene ).Your kids will become more independent and confident.
  • Before they leave home, they should know how to successfully cook and eat well when on their own.
  • Teach them the difference between food and highly processed food items. If you don’t have a garden consider starting a container garden and shopping from a farmers market.

Get more information here;

Food A fact Of Life

Why is Farm-to-School Important?

Noodles does NOT come from a can!

ENJOY!- QC Supermom

Wednesday Wow: I’m Not A Grinch!

What If Christmas means more?

What If Christmas means more?

Every Who down in Who-ville liked Christmas a lot… sorta like my Facebook timeline. Everyone is cooking, shopping and “selfi-ing!” And I think it’s really cute actually but the stress that come with buying to expectations……. it’s way to overwhelming.

It’s official, the kids have named us Mr. and Mrs. Grinch last night! In the back of my mind, I thought it was a compliment. He is a wise ole’ cat.

So yes, I’m ok with that. I understand that they have to be reminded everyonce in a while the purpose of the holiday.  It is hard when grandparents and others gift them but it comes back full circle when I start quoting my favorite scences from The movie, ” How The Grinch Stole Christmas.”

And then, they’ll do something I hate most of all. Every Who down in Who-ville, the tall and the small, will stand close together… with Christmas bells ringing. They’ll stand hand in hand… and those Whos… will start singing!

Christmas should mean more.

Christmas should mean more.

We do not celebrate Christmas in our home the way most people do.

 “I MUST find some way to stop Christmas from coming!” “I MUST stop this Christmas from coming! But HOW?” …….They’re finding out now that no Christmas is coming! They’re just waking up, I know just what they’ll do. Their mouths will hang open a minute or two, then the Whos down in Whoville will all cry, “Boo Hoo.”

Narrator: And what happened, then? Well, in Whoville they say – that the Grinch’s small heart grew three sizes that day. And then – the true meaning of Christmas came through, and the Grinch found the strength of*ten Grinches, plus two!

For us it’s a time of service. Like an extension of Thanksgiving! Gifts are for birthdays and that is when we go all out for our children and other loved ones.( I personally only know three people who has a birthdays on December 25th.) 

 

Just add green cookies!

Just add green cookies!

OK, out of my way, small Who, I’ve got better things to do than to spend my time with you on Grinch Night.  I know just what to do! I’ll make a quick Santy Claus hat and a coat! All I need is a reindeer!

(time to get ready to volunteer for Entrepreneur High School and prepare for Kwanzaa tomorrow!  ” Grinch is gonna getcha, Grinch is gonna getcha, Grinch indeedy, fa-la-la! YA!” Tomorrow is Christmas. It’s practically here!

Now pucker up and kiss it, Whoville!

handmade  christmas giftsClick here for cute Grinch theme clips! You’ll love them!

Here’s a great playlist for tomorrow!- Various artist holiday songs and the list is here.

Wednesday Wow:Halley Berry’s Daughter said WHAT?

himThis has been a busy week. I’ve been all over the place with workshops, births and the children’s educational pursuits. The other day, something came to my mind, and I had to remember why is it that I never talk about my husband.

Yes, the wind beneath my wing, my main cat, my biggest driver, baby daddy, my King, anchor, my barrel of crazy. “Rajah.”

I think because of my mission is to uplift motherhood so much I’ve always focused on strengthen the mother child bond over the husband-wife connection. Let me put a pause in the thick of things to shed light on the importance of a great marriage via Nahla Berry.

I came across this heading, ”  Halle Berry’s Daughter Creates “Top Ten” List For Married Couples  ” It was a  segment of Late Show With David Letterman with an adorable “Top Ten Ways to Stay Married” list, created by her 6-year-old daughter, Nahla.

My first thought was…. how in the world would she know such things, but if you listen in, the little angel has a pretty good head on her shoulders. Bless her heart.

In the comments, someone mentioned that she know these things because of her moms failures. I say whatever it takes to make you a better person- go for it. I learned a lot watching my parents and other couples around me. I knew right away what I wanted and didn’t want in a relationship. I also watch myself. I didn’t want to ever be ” that type”  of wife. You KNOW WHAT I’m talking about. Go on and let your mind drift  anywhere you like.

When I met my children’s father, I MUCH thinner, more wild, and less enlightened. I’ll be the first to tell you that, over the last 16 years, I’ve been able to improve on two of the three things posted. He can accept that because I have accepted his changes as well. Why? Because he is still a great partner, meanest cheerleader and respectful friend. I guess it’s fair to say that, I get more production over problems with him.

The SUPER parents

The SUPER parents

In closing, I thinks it’s a great list and should be considered by any soon to be bride. Take a look and tell me what you think while I figure out wear I’ll wear my wedding dress to next.