Wednesday Wow: Sister SoulJah in the QC

Happy Black History Month people! My month of reflection began last week when Sister SoulJah visited the Beatties Ford Rd. library in Charlotte NC. It was like a dream come true. I now have one less thing to accomplish on my Bucket List!

I believe in divine interventions. I believe that you are where you are, sent elsewhere, drawn toward something or some one beyond your conscious efforts. It’s like the minute you intentional strive to be a certain way, your path opens up! The I decided that I would be the best mom I could be. So I sought support. I know I wanted  to connect with people who have taken various paths in life to become the incredible leaders they are today.  (In this video, it’s another great woman, Cheryl LittleJohn of Gastonnia)

During a recent visit to my local library, I seen a flyer saying Sister Souljah was coming to Charlotte for a book signing of her book The Coldest Winter Ever  (you can buy it on Amazon via the high light link)

This was perfect because I had just received her first book from my daughters. They found it in a bin at a local book store for free!

It’s called, No DISRESPECT.  It took me 3 weeks to read it. Not that it’s a hard read or anything, it’s just that I wanted to break it up in sections to use as a conversation piece while taking my girls to school across town in the mornings. It proved to be an asset. Our conversations were deeper. They opened up about the peers and day environment more easily. It’s because she is so relative, approachable, and in sync, I know her books will always  have a place within my family’s book shelf.

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It was a honor to be in her presence with my teen daughters.  Sometimes when we tell our children things, they don’t always “get it!” Even if you experience it and crying your eyes out to warn them. But when it comes from another person. that speaks to them on their level. Spitting out a”  MF*”  here and there….. they tend to get it!

Here’s my short handed-cliff notes. I wrote them on the back of the paper I had signed for two mama friends. I wrote what she said. Do not let your child read it before you.

Sister SoulJahsister Soulajah.jpg

 

It’s been a long time. I haven’t wasted even a second. Been writing, editing, learning, teaching, and traveling the globe. This year, from 11/11 onward, is for the readers and book buyers. We will meet face to face. Share thoughts and converse meaningfully, and become better than we were before, each and all of us, InshaAllah.

If you want to sing your book and listen to her in person, meet her at her next book signing: click below!

http://www.sistersouljah.com/tour/

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Friday Four: Finding Chastity

Ok, yes, I know it may be strange for a teen mom like myself to bring up chastity, but YES…. I am. I mean, think about it. Who better? I think I scared my husband so much that when he found out we were having daughters, the first thing came out of his mouth was”I want to get my girls to wear chastity belts!” True story.    It was the first time I have ever heard about chastity belts, but as time past, it was shout out time after time at very interesting times ranging from self preservation to political statements.

 

Believe it or not, there was an Italian woman forced to ask firefighters to liberate her from a chastity belt because she lost the key to the contraption. The woman, who has not been named due to privacy reasons, reportedly wore the belt of her own volition to stop herself from having sexual relations. Chastity belts were long thought to have been inflicted on medieval wives in order to prevent them from having affairs, but historians now believe that they are the stuff of myth; most references to chastity belts in medieval literature are satirical. Our anonymous Italian friend, it seems, did not get the memo. If only she had guarded the key to her iron panties with the same sort of fervor that she dedicated to protecting her loins. NY TIMES

“I tried to push her away, but she wouldn’t stop until she was finished. When she was, she said, “You better not say shit to no one or else you gonna get a terrible whupping.” R. Kelly via The Black Voices

4 Ways to ENCOURAGE chastity to teens:

  1. Protect what your child is exposed.  Give the talk, but walk the walk. Our children can more easily recognize the distinction between right and wrong when we are consistent models of right behavior in all matters. So know that there are some magazines, t.v. shows. and conversations you may need to keep out their reach.

“I tried to push her away, but she wouldn’t stop until she was finished. When she was, she said, “You better not say shit to no one or else you gonna get a terrible whupping.” R. Kelly via The Black Voices

2. Be mindful of who your child is exposed to. Having the right influence around your children is detrimental. My husband and I never let our children out of our sight until they were old enough to articulate what went on around them and understood that their body was private. Our ideal influence are positive, loving (but not too loving*) respectful and non over sexually seductive -dressed person, media, t.v. programs and music..

When my niece was young, like 12,  she made it very clear that not only did she know her daughter had a boyfriend she also said that she did care.  She though because her daughter minion family partydidn’t go anywhere with the boy, that meant there was no concern for that relationship. Well guess what happened less than 3 years later? Yes, she got pregnant. While I didn’t rub it in her face or reminded  her that girls don’t go from pumps to flops. Sex was bound to happen. I thanked God that I never questioned my rules toward my daughters on having boyfriends at a young age.

3. If you haven’t already, build trust. That leads to many opportunities for discussion  and  influence on the subject. We parents have so much more power than we give our-self credit for.

4.Last but not least. Get your child involved in worthwhile activities, like music, sports, drama, and hobbies that develop talents.

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I never share pictures of gifts, but I had to share this one. Kaylah’s Sweet 16 gift arrived. Kudos to my Dad, the first man to place a ring on his granddaughter’s hand, he has definitely set the bar. Love him infinity. He said “who’s her Grandpa”!!

More great tips on teen chastity

eHere – yes, just click that 🙂

Alright ladies, keep it locked down.

Jabela!

The Sweet 16 Book

Yesterday, I had 2 (two) 15 year olds today, I have 2 (two) 16 year olds. QC Supermom Sweet 16They are a year apart, but one girls birthday is the 22, the other is the 27th and the third daughter – another year apart birthday is the end of next month.  They have been cooking for years. Which is a great life long skill. So this part of her Sweet 16 Book is easy.

What is the  “Sweet 16 Book?” It’s the mega life hack book for all  teen girls. The purpose of this book is to ensure that I haven’t missed anything in my mission in preparing them for adulthood. I want their future husband, employees, and friends to view them as a blessing and not look at me crossed eyes for sending them out the house ignorant and useless.Also the goal is to answer the question what else is there to know beside your left and right turn signals from the drivers testing booklet.

Today I’m covering RECIPES:

These recipes will make them look good at any dinner party. First up is easy,

40zChinese Fried Rice

Ingredients

  • 1 Cup Cooked Brown Rice
  • 1½ Cups Frozen Peas and Carrots
  • 1 Medium Onion diced
  • 2 TBS Olive Oil
  • 1 TBS Garlic Powder
  • ¼ Cup Soy Sauce
Instructions
  1. Sautee diced onion in the olive oil until onions are cooked through.
  2. Add in frozen peas and carrots and cook until warm throughout.
  3. Add in rice and let it sizzle for about 2 minutes on each side before stirring.
  4. Sprinkle in garlic powder and soy sauce.
  5. Serve hot.

Recipe Two –4o0z

Turkey Sausage Jambalaya Recipe
 Ingredients
  • 1 Green Bell Pepper chopped
  • 4 Cloves Fresh Garlic chopped (about ¼ cup)
  • 2 Medium Sweet Onions chopped
  • 2 Medium Tomatoes chopped
  • 1 Package Polska Kielbasa Turkey Sausage chopped into ¼ inch pieces.
  • 2 Cups Brown Rice
  • 2 Cups Chicken Broth
  • 3 Cups Water
  • 1 TBS Chili Powder
  • 1 8oz Can Tomato Sauce
  • 1 TBS Oregano, Pink Salt & Pepper
  • 1 TBS Butter
Instructions
  1. Melt the butter.
  2. Add in chopped green pepper, onion, and garlic.
  3. Sautee pepper, onion, and garlic for about 5 minutes or until onion starts to turn clear.
  4. Add in chili powder, oregano, salt, pepper, tomatoes, and your favorite Polska turkey sausage.
  5. Sautee for 10 minutes. Pour in chicken broth, water, tomato sauce, and rice.
  6. Bring to a boil and cook on medium heat until rice is tender and liquid has completely evaporated.

// // // // // // // // // // // // // Southern Black Eyed Peas40oz// // // //

Ingredients

  • 12 oz bag of frozen black eyed peas
  • 2 Cups chicken stock
  • Small onion diced
  • 1 TBS butter
  • ¼ Cup cubed turkey bacon
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 1 tsp vinegar

Instructions

  1. Combine all ingredients into a pot and bring to a boil.
  2. Once boiling, lower the heat and simmer for 45 minutes.

Enjoy, QCSupermom