Friday Four: Peer Pressure and the home-schooled girl

peer-pressure-by-junkbyjenIn all my days, I have never heard of home school children dealing with peer pressure. How odd- right? But that’s exactly what my 14 year old daughter is dealing with right now. Thanks to social media, she has many associates still in local public school system. So it allows her to stay in the loop with all sorts of children.

So when she came home and said that she was frustrated, I listened. I figured if it bothered her enough to mention it to me, it’s enough for me to listen and if needed- act on it.Again,it’s not everyday a home schooled child experiences peer pressure. Right now “D” volunteers at a teen library . After school many latch-key kids go there to hang out.

My daughters are princess.

My daughters are princess.

We’ll this week she was catching pure teen heck. There were a group of kids just nagging her. They wanted her to hang out downtown, at their house, no where – anywhere type of thing. One even called her a flake. A guy from that group, wanted to date her and she politely refused him and he wanted to know why she was acting sidity and hard to get?

After sorting everything out to get a better understanding, I explained to her that not everyone is happy with themselves and don’t know how to fix their issues. They are threatened by the potential success of others, so they want to stop you before you outshine them or reveal their shortcomings. For me , my mission was to get her to understand that it wasn’t about her. And that she is hard to get. And she will never sit around in anyone’s house or in the streets, she’s better than that.


It’s very hard to bully children that are ready willing and able to defend themselves. If children don’t learn when and how to stick up for themselves and to start taking some responsibility for their own security at a young age then when? We as parents and educators need to stop pretending that fire isn’t sometimes fought with fire when necessary.

Well, since she is home schooled and not in public school. I had to get creative. With the right strategy she will leave this stage of her life stronger and better prepare for life. Here’s our plan-

1. Remind her who she is and the goals that she is trying to achieve and let her confirm the best path to follow.

2.  Ensure she has a strong rebuttal should she has further encounters. For example, she can say ” Too bad you don’t have anything else to do but loaf around. I don’t have time to date or hang out. As a matter of fact, I’m running late right now.”

3. She can direct them on how to get involved with her activities….. when she’s not there of course.

4.  Instead of allowing the bully(s) to make her uncomfortable while there, she should direct her conversations with other visitors and staff that may actually need her help.

I wouldn’t suggest that you approach the bullies yourself or get on the bus. Yes, it’s fun, it does work somewhat but what you want is a your child to be able to defend herself and come out a stronger person at the end of it. Looking at this picture taken last night, and her Facebook post,” my mommy always has the right answer (: 

I think she has it under control. Motherhood 1 Peer Pressure 0

Teen Life!

Teen Life!

Have a sweet weekend.

QC Supermom

By:                 Chocolate-Coconut-Bars
Serves: 64 – 1 inch pieces
  • 1 Cup Organic Extra Virgin Coconut oil
  • 2 cups unsweetened shredded coconut
  • ¼ cup honey
  • 12 oz Semi sweet/dark chocolate chips
  1. Warm coconut oil just until it becomes liquid.
  2. Mix the shredded coconut and honey into the coconut oil, combining well.
  3. Press mixture into an 8×8 pan lined with parchment paper and freeze or refrigerate until sold.
  4. Heat chocolate chips in microwave at 50% power in 30 second intervals, stirring each time until completely melted.
  5. Pour over coconut spreading evenly. Top with extra coconut if desired. Refrigerate for chocolate to set.
  6. Cut into 1 inch squares and store in the fridge until ready to eat.
  7. **Dairy Free** Use Ghirardelli semi sweet or other dairy free chocolate
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