If you have ever been to a African American church in the South East, you know what a spirit filled testimony is. Let’s pretend it’s Sunday morning for just a bit shall we.
I grew up in a church very similar to this one in SC.
This is The Day The Lord Has Made. I will Rejoice And Be Glad In It.
First off, I want to give thanks to the creator of everything good, bad and down right ugly. For each of those things have humbled me and kept me grateful. This morning when I woke up, I had NO doubt that it was a gift from God.
I stand before my you with greetings from Bedside Methodist Living Water- All ways on time Church of God. Where the pastor is none other than Pastor Isis Brown.
Many attend HBCUs to become closer to their roots, learn more about their history, and be in an environment with other black students who wanted to do the same.
I wanted to give thanks today. 21 years ago when they said you’re pregnant, I wanted to pull out my happy hand and slap everyone. Starting with myself, the person that read the results, took my urine samples and the guy that gave me the sperm. I didn’t know then but it was a blessing in disguise. I was blessed to have parents that was willing and able to help out. To them, the focus hurry up learn something and get your child.Over the years, we walked along the path of life with other amazing people. Life as a teen mom had its ups and downs. But there were always angels to help us along the way. I would share the list but I know the food is waiting for us in the kitchen.
Janelle Linnen.
I had the honor of attending my very 1st HBSU college basketball game this week at South Carolina State University. Hampton tore their behind up! Church ya’ll should’ve seen them dunks, plays, pep squad, incredible band, attending Greeks, vibrant fans; ooowee! We had a great time. Well in that moment, I realized that every minute of the nine months, calls to the coach, having his dad take him to the ” Scared Straight”program, making him sleep in the car, getting him to help in the garden, and every other strategy used was well worth it. My son is a student at Hampton University. He’s happy, and doing what he loves most while bringing much joy to the world. So church, I won’t take up much more of your time. I just wanted to say, Thank God for the village!
(If you have never attended a Historically Black College and University basketball game, find the nearest one to you and go.If you need to rent a car, like we did (ours got total lost; call Joy over there at Crown Rental on Orr Rd., she’ll hook you up). It’s an amazing experience!) Well, I’ll have my seat now. Thank you for ya time and let’s worship!
First off, let me say this: Nine children is not the best idea for everyone! Some days I wonder if I am sane for having so many children. Then I wake up, look at them and get reassured that yes, I was born for this. Here’s why.
” How can you say there are too many children? That is like saying there are too many flowers. (Mother Teresa)”
9 reasons to have 9 kids
1. You can never hear “I love you mom!” enough and know that it’s 100% meaningful.
2. I’ll always have (another female) to share a spa date with, even if I have to cover the bill.
3.Someone to always share your interest’s with. While doing so, you maybe helping them find their calling….. or not! At least they will have a skill set.
Moms must have a sense of humor to survive. 🙂
4. You can start a business and have enough staff to work all positions, and will practically guarantee low turnover. Total win! Responsibility will be learned if nothing else.
5.Someone to get in trouble with. There will always be that one child that makes being naughty so much fun. My son encourages me to eat naughty food with pride.
6.Children makes life matter. There will be 9 reasons to behave and do your very best for and by them. I no longer park in the handicap space for quick trips to the grocery store.
7. Someone to always play basketball/flag ball or start a band with. What a way to guarantee exercise right?
8. Someone’s always there to listen, challenge you, disobey anyway. Then come back and say that you were right all along. This part comes with wisdom. If you haven’t gotten there yet, just wait it’s coming.
9. If you garden, you’ll have enough help to grow your own food or at least most of it. You can’t be upset with Monsanto. So we can beat them! Many hands make the work light.
10. BONUS~ When your children grow up and move away to other states, you’ll never have to pay for hotel stays again on choice.
Word on the web is there is a lady questioning the substance of being married and have children. I won’t give her much shine on this topic. But I will say this. Being the mother of 9/ 8 living productive child, that is either in college or being home-schooled is a rewarding success. My husband is a military veteran. He challenges me on a daily basis. But guess what, I love it. I know that he loves our huge family, me and our life. It’s because of this love, value and Queen City Stay At Home Moms that I am a happy, well balanced mom. And for the record, to be able to do all of this proves that there is a god that has a great sense of humor.
In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it’s not perfect, that’s okay, there are a lot more coming along. Antonin Scalia
Love the children, no matter how many you have! Create them GREAT!
I have a new client and yes, it’s a dog. Not what I had in mind for my sixth client, but hey you take lemons and make a yummy big cup of tea with it. A birth is a birth.
Same blood, pushing, waiting and excitement! But there are some differences between the two. Here’s four:
1. Star will have just nine weeks of pregnancy. (You should see the look on my face when I learned that) We can go for 10 months and these wild things only get 9 weeks? Thanks God.
2. Star won’t need a larger fitting wardrobe. My daughter wants to dress her up so bad. I may let her do something simple. Making certain not to pissed Star off too much. A I’ve learned that she is entering into a whelping stage (relative to a human moms nestling)
I added that picture because her puppies should look like that. Star is a small, white haired,albino terrier.
3. We can’t put child support on the pappy! Yes, dogs cost! I already have great homes for at of them. If she has more, we” that’s more work for me. We can’t afford to keep them.
4. It’s normal for Star to eat her placenta right smack there during delivery. I heard that will be a moment that I may want to look the other way for.
Fortunately dogs are much better equipped to deal with the whole birthing process than humans are. My role will be confined to making sure she is comfortable, watching from a sensitive distance, and only intervening if something goes seriously wrong
Well there’s a first for everything. Seems that my dog will have a doula.
(A birth doula /BIRTH ATTENDANT-
(pronounced ‘doo-la’) is a Greek word meaning ‘woman servant or caregiver; someone who offers emotional and physical support to a woman and her partner before, during and after childbirth. A doula believes in ‘mothering the mother’, enabling a woman to have the most satisfying experience that she can, from pregnancy and into motherhood.)
My baby girl is pregnant! She hasn’t said anything yet, but that belly is get pretty big AND she’s always hungry! It never clicked to me why there were so many dogs hanging around in the street by our home. She’s too old for this kinda stuff! Of course 42 in dog years,isn’t that old, but you know what I mean.
Constellation Dog Star
I seen it coming! I frowned as I watched her sniffing up in this short dogs face from the neighborhood. I called her back to the house and locked her up but shucks, that didn’t last long. She cried and my husband set our 4 legged hairy Houdini free again. As if our fenced back yard isn’t enough running space for her.
Omg! I have no coverage for her. What am I gonna do? Maybe I’m over reacting….. maybe not. Either way, Star is now a single mother.
Our dog, “Star”
I’m a mom and doula, but this is different! A million things are running through my head. OMG! Should I be changing her diet? Should I let her back in the house? What am I gonna do with her babies? Who is the daddy? How much longer does she have? Where will she deliver? Oh lord, my girl is promiscuous!!!!! That’s why she always want beef jerkies from 7-11.
After this is over, I’m getting this “B” fixed. Who want’s a puppy?
Every third Monday in January, we celebrate Martin Luther King Jr.,his visions and simple yet wise desires for all people. But have you ever noticed how some of his best quotes are so relative to motherhood? (YES, Motherhood!)
What mom doesn’t feel oppressed at times?
Mama said there would be days like this. Not everyday will be free wifi and yoga pants. Some days will make you want to pull your hair out! As a mother of 9,I know that disappointment comes with the territory. Some how Dr. King addressed that.
It would be great if it was really what you seen on the Huxtibales where everything ends with a smile or like The Fresh Prince of Bel Air, where a charismatic, blended family is thriving with in the chaos. Reflecting on some of the powerful words of Martin Luther King Jr. I realized how complimentary his quotes are toward motherhood. He spoke a lot about endurance and maintaining character during edgy times.
The timing for this discovery couldn’t come at a better. Today was…… wait for it; “One of Those Days.” I was SO frustrated and felt that no one was able or capable of helping me.
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” Martin Luther King, Jr.
I know it’s ok to be frustrated.No mom should ever deny her feelings and emotions. But every once in a while, I do wish things would be different. The good thing is that I know that it’s okay to acknowledge my it AND keep it moving. Why? Because if things were indeed different, I would be different. My children, siblings, EVERYTHING would be different,and I’m not sure if I want that. Long pity-parties are okay for 40 minutes. I sit in it for a minutes, determine what part I could have done differently and if possible, figure way(s) to minimize it from happening again. After many deep breaths, my favorite cup of tea,a quiet sit in my walk in closet alone and I’m good for the rest of the day. (In That Order!)
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” Martin Luther King, Jr.
Bad days are coming and some will be worse than others. Ultimately It’s what you learn, grow and correct from it. We moms must learn the value of endurance. Endurance requires planfulness and balance, not just strength of will. It calls from ourselves a renewed commitment and effort when we are confronted with challenges or hardship. Endurance means that we remain steadfast even through criticism, monotony, and discouraging odds.
“There comes a time when the cup of endurance runs over, and men are no longer willing to be plunged into the abyss of despair.” ― Martin Luther King Jr.
Ok well, the pity part is over and it’s time to get back to celebrating Dr.Martin Luther King Jr.’s Day. Have a great day and ENDURE!
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. MLK Jr.
Some exciting things are going on. Last week Dr. Franklin McCain was laid to rest. Next week we will be celebrating the life of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. These two courageous and powerful men have proven to be worthy of both our admiration and respect, based on the life they lived.
As I sit with my children, I discover so many qualities between these two men and decided to create a homeschool lesson about them. To my surprise they were deeply interested in what both Dr’s King and ” Greensboro Four” MccCain stood for. Needless to say, I was ecstatic that they offered to help with this post. (Awe the rewards of motherhood) A part of their report follows.
Excerpts from: 2 Heroes: Martin L. King Jr. and Franklin McCain
When teenager Franklin McCain decided to make a stand against segregation at the F.W. Woolworth’s lunch counter in Greensboro, N.C., in 1960, two thoughts weighed on him.
“If I were lucky, I would go to jail for a long, long time. If I were not quite so lucky,” he recalled to a reporter five decades later, “I would come back to my campus … in a pine box.”
His name was originally Michael, not Martin. His father was also Michael King, hence why MartinLutherKingJr. was originally named Michael KingJr.
Here are 4 more facts I learned about “Our Friend Martin”:
1.He skipped both the ninth and the twelfth grade and entered Morehouse College at age fifteen without formally graduating from high school.
2. King married Coretta Scott, on June 18, 1953, on the lawn of her parents’ house in her hometown of Heiberger, Alabama. They had four children; Yolanda King, Martin Luther King III, Dexter Scott King, and Bernice King.
3. At his funeral no mention of his awards and honors be made, but that it be said that he tried to “feed the hungry”, “clothe the naked”, “be right on the [Vietnam] war question”, and “love and serve humanity.”
4.In 1968, King and the SCLC organized the “Poor People’s Campaign” to address issues of economic justice. The campaign culminated in a march on Washington, D.C. demanding economic aid to the poorest communities of the United States.
MomsRising is doing it AGAIN. You’re invited to a Free Family-Friendly Event to celebrate Martin Luther King life and legacy in a way that children can understand. Featuring Dr. Charmaine McKissick-Melton who, along with her sisters and brother, was one of the first black children to desegregate Durham Public Schools. Highlights also include civil-rights themed crafts, musical performances by Musician Corps showcasing freedom songs and instruments popular in the civil rights movement, a photo gallery, and, of course, birthday cake! Sponsored by NC Momsrising, Northgate Mall, Lango Kids, Durham Mothers Club, Chapel Hill/Carrboro Mothers Club, Kids Voting Durham, and MomInChapelHill.
I am collecting and trying various recipes. Currently I am making home made fabric softener, and a food safe spray cleaner for my kitchen counters. I will NEVER buy fabric softener again! Why?
1. It saves me money. (That’s enough right there.)
2. I can control the ingredients, which allows me to eliminate the toxins found in the majority of store-bought household cleaners. Makes sense right?
There are many inexpensive, easy-to-use natural alternatives which can safely be used in place of commercial household products. Here is a list of common, environmentally safe products which can be used alone or in combination for a wealth of household applications.
Baking Soda – cleans, deodorizes, softens water, scours.
Soap – unscented soap in liquid form, flakes, powders or bars is biodegradable and will clean just about anything. Avoid using soaps which contain petroleum distillates.
Lemon – one of the strongest food-acids, effective against most household bacteria.
White Vinegar – cuts grease, removes mildew, odors, some stains and wax build-up.
Washing Soda – or SAL Soda is sodium carbonate decahydrate, a mineral. Washing soda cuts grease, removes stains, softens water, cleans wall, tiles, sinks and tubs. Use care, as washing soda can irritate mucous membranes. Do not use on aluminum.
Isopropyl Alcohol– is an excellent disinfectant. (It has been suggested to replace this with ethanol or 100 proof alcohol in solution with water. There is some indication that isopropyl alcohol buildup contributes to illness in the body. See http://drclark.ch/g)
Cornstarch– can be used to clean windows, polish furniture, shampoo carpets and rugs.
Citrus Solvent – cleans paint brushes, oil and grease, some stains. (Citrus solvent may cause skin, lung or eye irritations for people with multiple chemical sensitivities.)
Toothpaste:
Equal parts baking soda and coconut oil, plus mint extract for flavor. OR baking soda and peppermint oil OR baking soda and coconut oil and peppermint oil
Laundry detergent-
I use goat milk soap grated
Borax
Washing soda
Vinegar
Essential oils OR
2 c borax
2 c washing soda
1 bar fels naphtha
I grate the bar soap and put it in my blender to make a fine powder. Then mix all 3 ingredients and you’re done! Use 1-2 tbsp per load
Homemade Face wash-
Honey
Sweet almond oil
Baking soda
Essential oil
Salt srub-
Coconut oil
Epsom salt
Essential oils
Homemade deodorant-
Coconut oil
Arrowroot
Baking soda
Beeswax
Essential oil
Homemade disinfectant spray-
Water
Vodka
Essential oils-grapefruit/eucalyptus
Homemade air freshner-
Water
Vodka
Essential oils-grapefruit/lime/lemon
Tell me about some of yours or any from the above you would like to try. As you can see these are all very simple and cost friendly. One change makes a big difference in your families health and well being!
As a Stay At Home Mom, I must acknowledge and address both the perks and pitfalls of managing, a large family with limited income. 99.6 % of the time I am content. My motto is “Mess with me, you might get by with an eye roll. Mess with my children, and you better run”. (My husband can take care of himself. He’s a tough guy.) TODAY I sat in that .40% and I did’t know why.
I love this!
Everything on the surface appeared fine. The children had no complaints. I even called my son in college to listen to his voice and to see if I could pick up on any cues, he too sound great. So yes, I was grateful to mentally clear that off my mind.
Yet something was not right. Maybe I’m over processing something or maybe God is trying to direct me to a new place or possibly stopping me from making a big mistake, I thought. Have you ever felt unsettled in your spirit?
I do have a lot going on these days. ( 9 children, a crazy veteran husband, I’m still breastfeeding our youngest, SAHM group organizer, tutor, community activator, AND blogger) Needless to say our days often feel like an insane whirlwind of needs, requests, deadlines and never-ending demands, but I honestly love it all. Crazy right?
So, I tiptoed into my bedroom closet for a few minutes. I walked out to a revelation. I hated that I didn’t notice it before, as it’s been repressed for a while. I ignored my hair breaking off, chalking it up to the harsh cold weather. I also ignored my jumping eye lid, crediting my lack of sleep for that. BUT when I started getting nervous for no reason. I had to hit the breaks and put myself first.
My financial insecurities, and concern that the world is more perilous for kid raising than when I grew up.
Before I got married. I worked three jobs. Two in hospitality and one in appointment setting. I LOVED making my own money. Being able to make purchases without permission, consent or validation was the life.Not that I was wasteful, because I wasn’t but it is a level of empowerment. Yes, when I got married he & I became 1. But I lost that power, I need it back. My husband will never understand it. It’s nothing like having your own, and bringing it to the family table.
Jessica Beals has Nothing on me. Pass the mic…… next year …. please. 🙂
When I was young, we had more hope. I like to think that I’m raising amazing children and equipping them for today’s challenges. If it wasn’t for my moms group and my Kwanzaa family, I would think that I live on a island. These children today will choose short cuts every time. The value of life, inner pride, zest for the future, moral codes are diminished. It’s saddening.
Well, after a good cup of tea, a stress busting video, and a silent peek at my beautiful children (sleeping face I think everything will work itself out as it should.In the meantime, I have to come up with some strategies that will work with my time and generate real income…… then tease my husband by buying the girls new earrings. (yes, that would drive him nutty! 🙂 )
I’m thinking about AVON. I love their new line. With my large family, and the new product line, earnings seems quite promising. We’ll at least till something better comes along.See, it’s looking better already. Putting myself self first hasn’t wavered my goal of keeping my children a priority.
Crown Rent A Car: 704-247-9002 ask for Joy 5923 Orr Road Charlotte, NC 2821
This week we went on our 1st family trip to Durham, N.C. to see my oldest son play basketball. He attends Hampton University. They played North Carolina Central University, another Historically Black College and University (HBCU). Our young sons were excited about the idea of seeing their brother in action. The girls were happy to get out of Charlotte (the QC). Between my husband & it was combination of the both. Our biggest challenge was what we would drive. Our van burned up a few months ago. FAST FORWARD- we found a wonderful company that rented us a nice minivan that everyone was able to ride legally and comfortably.
Here are some of the pictures from the day. As I Look at these images, my heart affirms the blessings that comes in having children. I never imagined how wonderful it is to have such a big family. Totally worth the money we spent. I only hope that we secure another mini van soon. I can’t wait to see him in action again.
As it ended, Hampton lost, by 8 points or so. No, I didn’t keep score. The younger boys & I were to busy being cheerleaders. Without a doubt, it was worth the trip. The NCCU band was incredible. I learned a few moves from the dance team, and the competitive spirit of both school alumni was catchy. I was even able to throw in a lesson plan for the girls. Watching my son in his element was a humble moment. To share it all with my dad, aunt, and cousins PRICELESS!
Here’s what we spent:
Minivan for $119.00 Thanks CROWN RENTAL on Orr Road. Ask for Joy, she’s wonderful.
$50 in gas
$40 in food for the day ( we packed sandwich, fruit and boxed juices).
We got the tickets for free. (Each player gets 4 personal tickets per game.)
There’s much more to life than those basic subjects, and unless you have an exceptional teacher who is willing to break out of the mold, your child isn’t learning the crucial things he or she needs to learn in life.
Think about your own experience for a moment. When you got out of high school, did you know everything you needed in order to survive in life, let alone succeed? I didn’t.
No Charge!
Being in Rhode Island for 16 months to finishing up my bachelor’s degree then Atlanta for 5 months (Marriott Management In Training program after college) alone taught me a lot.
I promised myself that my child would never be as naive and unprepared as I was. Because we homeschool, we have the privilege to customized our children education as we please for the most part, based on North Carolina Department on Non Public Education (NCDNPE)
What follows is a basic list that all children should know before reaching adulthood. There will probably be other skills you can add to this list, but at least it’s a starting point.
Social– Things will not always go as planned. But they can be changed for the better. Find solutions instead of complaints. And most of all, learn to believe in yourself, and to block out negative self-thinking internal and externally.
Spiritual- Whether this is a higher religious purpose, or the purpose of making your family happy, or the purpose of finding your calling, having a purpose in life is extremely important. Teach your children the importance of this and show how to do it yourself.
Be intimate: Teach by having an intimate relationship with your child, and model it with your spouse or other significant other (within appropriateness). Teach them the skills for developing these types of relationships, talk about the importance of it, and how to get through the bumpy parts as well. There are bad times in every relationship, but with the right skills of communication, empathy and compromise, they can get through them.
Environmental includes living in harmony with the Earth by understanding the impact of your interaction with nature and your personal environment, and taking action to protect the world around you. Protecting yourself from environmental hazards and minimizing the negative impact of your behavior on the environment are also central elements. Leading a lifestyle that is respectful to our environment and minimizes any harm done to it is a critical part of this dimension of wellness.
My number 8 and 9 learning how to feed themselves= Priceless!
Educational– One of the most important skills not taught in school. These days, we are taught to be robots, to listen to the teacher and not to question, to accept what we are told and not to think, to be good employees and to shut up. If you’re an employer, you might want your employees to be like this, and if you’re a politician, you might want your citizens to be like this. But is that how you want your child to be? An unquestioning, naive, ignorant citizen/employee/student? If so, carry on. If not, just start introducing the habit of questioning why? And the skill of find out the answer. And how to question authority — there is no one right answer. Conversation is a good way to accomplish this skill.
Financial-This is something to teach them from an early age. How to
shop around to get
good deal, to compare between products of different prices and quality, to make things last and not waste, to control impulse buying. When we go out and do a shopping spree, including before Christmas, we are teaching them just the opposite. Teach them the responsible use for money and credit, and how to avoid it when it’s not necessary, and how to avoid getting into too much debt, and how to use a credit card responsibly.a
Physical- People who lead an active life are more likely to live longer and less likely to develop serious diseases such as heart disease, cancer and diabetes. Exercise not only makes you physically fitter, it also improves your mental health and general sense of wellbeing. There are so many fun ways to sneak it in your child brain as a fun thing to do.
Today’s kids (and their moms) report being surrounded by healthy eating messages. In fact, when asked about where they are learning about “healthy eating”, kids (8-11) cite many different sources.2 Of these, traditional venues (parents, teachers, medical personnel) reign supreme. Global Kids Study
Nutritional- It is directly linked to all aspects of their growth and development; factors which will have direct ties to their level of health as adults. Almost certainly helping them to live longer. Countless studies show that what someone learns as a child is then perpetuated
I call those the 7 branches of Wellness. Here are a few other ideas! throughout their life.
Practical
Auto. Why cars are needed (no, not to look cool), how to buy a practical car, how to take care of it. How the engine works, what might break down, and how it’s fixed. Should be taught to both boys and girls (that should be obvious, but I had to say it).
Household. How to fix things around the house and keep things maintained. Plumbing, electricity, heating and cooling, painting, roofing, lawn, all that good stuff. The tools and skills necessary to do just the basic maintenance and repairs. And how to know when to call a professional.
Cleaning. Too many adults grow up without knowing how to do laundry, to clean a house properly, to keep the house clean and uncluttered, to have a weekly and monthly cleaning routine.
Organization. How to keep paperwork organized, how to keep things in their place, to to keep a to-do list,how to set routines, how to focus on the important tasks.
A note on how to teach these things: These points should taught by setting examples, by conversation, by showing, and by allowing the child (or teenager) to do these things on their own (with supervision at first). Once you’ve talked about the skill, showed your child how to do it, and let them do it under supervision a few times, give your child the trust to do it on his own, and to learn from his own mistakes.
QC Supermom 